Pointless things people (even me) did on Orkut

Last week, I got a blast from the past; I received an orkut friend request from an old acquaintance, its been ages since I accessed orkut page much less connect with anyone. This made think about the old days when orkut was a rage and how Indians got the first taste of social networking ( it was simply called orkutting back then :P )

How many scraps do you have ??

People actually kept count of the scraps on their profile and cheered on when they hit land marks like 1000, 2000 etc. Any guy/gal with 5000 scraps was popular but someone with 10,000 scraps was a orkut super-star.

Profile visit kiya but scrap nahi kiya

The creepy feature of orkut allowed you to note people who visited your profile recently, and people took serious offense to not been scrapped when someone left their digital footprint on their profile.

Sugary sweet testimonials

the extension of the how many scraps syndrome was how many testimonials do I have, emotional blackmail and quid-pro-quo ensured. But on the other hand, it did make for cheap thoughtful birthday gifts ;) get it “on your birthday, I really wanna share ….”.

Increasing Fans on orkut

I know one particular friend of mine who would become fans of all people in the friend list, so that even 50% reciprocity would ensure he/she would become the most Fanned person.

Wanna be fraindship

as a guy, I wasn't so bothered but girls got hit on so often with unsolicited friendship requests from English murdering desis :)

Today, orkut has become a sort of relic, with facebook and twitter ruling the roost today, but orkut had its dream run in the days of clunky assembled desktops and seedy cyber cafes. Now we have neat 3G and GPRS smartphones. 

Cheers to the initial heady days of social networking!  

First Love

Bittu was very excited today because she was going to come home today. He always hated his mom's music classes for years. But for past few weeks his mind had changed.
He never believed in love or cheesier concepts of love at first sight, but he was having second thoughts now. There was something about her which drew him so explicitly.

He was never uncomfortable with attention before. Girls had always found him cute and loved to pull his cheeks. He totally hated that but he was ready to make an exception
for her. Although he was so excited with the new feelings but he was bit confused. Life had become fuzzy in the last few weeks, it became the waits between the times she would
come in for her singing classes.

Man, she had the voice and the eyes of an angel. He worried if she knew how he felt, also if she felt the same way. Somehow he wanted a way to know how. One thing he knew asking
her out straight away would be too risky, play it cool. Next time, she came over he asked her, he greeted her, She replied “Hi Bittu how are you ?”, hmmm Sona you err...want to watch a movie.
“Sure only if you will you buy me popcorn?. but only Caramel ok". Man that was easy, Bittu thought with a sigh of relief.
His feelings were not hidden from his parents, especially his Mom.Mom asked what “Bittu challa (loads) feelings for Sona aah ?”. Bittu blushed taken in partly by surprise mostly by shock.
But slowly he admitted “yes I love her. Mom should I tell her?” Mom said “ No Beta let me talk to her, waise aren't you too young for this?”.
Next time Sona came for classes, Bittu was hiding in his room peeking with anxiety and excitement what will she said. But Mom knows best. She asked “Sona will you marry my Bittu?”
Ouch, very subtle Mom so very subtle, there goes any chance of even looking at her face to face forget giving this relationship a chance. Sona blushed for a second, she said
“why not Aunty, Bittu is so cute”. Wow that was easy. Days went by, as we spent time together life seemed perfect. But one day everything came crashing down....

Sona's mother came over one day. She came with sweets and greeted Mom. “Charulatha, Sona's marriage is fixed, boy is MBA and works with the IT industy and works in Gurgaon.Ladka is very nice”.
Mom said, “ great news Saritha, good good so Sona will relocate then.” Bittu felt he got hit by lighting. The feelings and dreams which felt so real came crumbling down.

That devilish girl, she led me on for so long. Why? My parents instead of raging and taking my side, are congrating that girl and her family. Is this what love stands for? Why was I such a fool?
Even though, the bitter pill of betrayal was hard to take, his undying love for Sona was even more hurtful. Why could he not forget her, why does she still seem the angel he fell for.

Sure she was older than him, She 23 years old and him all of 4 years.

Love still hurts doesnt it. Yes Bittu will learn to love again, but that first flush of emotions will always remain special. First Love indeed :-)

PS: Loosely based on a true story

Pointless things people say Part II – Shaadi ke Side Effects !!

The age of 26-27 is a very interesting period of life and a very challenging one. Your peer group begins to get married suddenly and suddenly the world becomes divided into the haves and have-nots. It does not matter which group you are in, you experience a weird feeling and are awkward how to talk about the topic regarding impeding marriage. The following are the few gems which you shall hear in conversations. What they say and What they mean.

You two make a great couple / You two look cute together


Even if the guy looks like a rhinoceros and the girl looks like giraffe who could be mistaken for a ladder, you have to say this statement because it is politically correct thing to say. Alternatively It is also a nice way of saying, teri aaukat ke liye this person is more than enough.


Who is the lucky girl ?


This is a line said with least conscience, especially when you know the guy is a drunkard, constant womanizer or he is very orthodox / boring. There is no way in life, you would want your sister or friends to marry this chap, still do you really think the girl is lucky. Shame on all of you who use this line without remorse.


Beta shaadi ke baad you are so dead !!


It is extremely ironical, it is always the single unmarried man who seems to know that marriage is a deathtrap. It has been passed on from generations of unmarried men to make fun of the guy who is going to get married. I mean what empirical proof exists that states that married folks are more unhappy than whining pining single clan ?


I have found the one....

I was given this unsolicited but extremely relevant advice by a thrice married and thrice divorced person that “ Get married early in life, then you get to choose, in case you wait too late you get chosen”.

Arranged or love marriages become a stressful experience after a period of time , if you have seen more and more people without success. At first you are idealistic, you have a role model about your ideal person. With more rejections on the way, then you think there is something wrong with you , so you are ready to compromise with your dream man/woman a little.

Eventually the little compromise ended up with you are just glad that he/she is human, off the opposite gender and for some wierd reason doesnt seem to dislike you unlike the rest of her/his gender.

The sentence should actually read as I have the found the one … ( perhaps the last one on earth so Hurry offer valid untill stocks last !! )


It happened so fast … I didn't time to tell anyone


I had all the time, I didnt have time to tell you even my my 3rd cousin from Alaska knew before you. I seriously hope you didn't fall for that one. The fact is I did not want to share it with you, at least now get a hint of your standing in my social circle you loser !!


Disclaimer – The comments are exaggerated liberally so don't take offense to them
Yeah right, I have said what I wanted to really say but now,with this disclaimer, I can shirk the responsibilities for my statements ;)

Pointless Things People Say !

Considering the 'busy' lives we yuppies (young urban professionals) allegedly live with only weekends to unwind and recoup. The weekends are the only thing to look forward to in lives. But people are always wanting that piece of our time. The ever increasing modes of communication like emails, social networking sites, mobile phones and instant messengers like gtalk/yahoo has made avoiding these people even tougher!

In order to avoid such people, a new set of pointless statements have been manufactured in order to make this more platable. These have now become part of daily conversations when we really do not want to keep in touch with people but also want to seem so politically correct about it.

Top pointless lines people say and what they mean :-

We should meet up/catch up sometime !

More like next lifetime or something, I hope I never bump into you any time soon.

I am bit busy at work, can we talk in the evening ....

Never mind, I am sitting right now in the canteen with similar jobless colleagues having coffee but I really do not want to talk to you.

I will call you on the weekend pucca

yeah Right, you could die waiting by the phone ….. get a life loser !!

Dil se he/she is not bad !

When you have nothing nice to say about a person … you end up saying this !

We stay in the same city and haven't met up it is really bad !

We stay in the same city and WOW am I glad the city is so big, I can avoid people like you :)

How is life ? Bas chal raha hai tu bata

Ultimate filler statement... I do not want to tell me how my life is !! but I do not mind if u spill the beans about your life...

I am so busy re, I just don't have time for anything these days...

I am not THAT busy, it is just that I do not have ANY TIME for you these days !!

This post has been written partly in jest and is highly exaggerated but the truth lies somewhere in between.