Gangnam Style, Kolaveri and Innocence

If you have an existence on social networking sites, you could not have missed a portly Korean man prancing around in extraordinary goofy style which is now "Gangnam Style" the most viewed and liked video in the history of Youtube.  

Some time back, another video sung quiet off-key by Southern Actor Dhanush "Kolaveri Di" was  the talk of town, this very ordinary piece of singing reaching a far greater reach than imagined.  Clearly in this era of the highly networked world, an Internet connection and social media channels like Twitter, Facebook and Youtube, ideas both good, bad, ugly and funny can resonate across the world. 

Takes me back to the song Friday by Rebecca Black which was derided by people all over the world, imagine the kind of rejection the poor girl would have faced.  Still the criticism stayed virtual or the trolls who hound celebs, journalists with vulgar and crude language. 


Sadly another video found a much larger audience than it should have, "The innocence of Muslims" a disparaging video made by mischievous elements with extremely poor production values and the voices overdubbed so even the actors were taken for a ride. 

Such an ugly video, found credence and has been circulated by the same social media channels which promote so much of mirth to become a weapon of hate, leading to deaths and damage to people and property. A mob killing an envoy, bomb killing Russians and South Africans in Afghanistan and attacks on Norwegian embassies and protests worldwide.

The Innocence of Muslims is not the only ugly video on the Internet, there are lots of hate videos against Hindus, Muslims, Christians and Sikhs. 

The violence has promoted many nations to block social media sites. Censorship will only take the world on a slippery road, and violence over hate speeches and thoughts will only increase the fault-lines in the society. 

Social Media is not the cause of unrest but only an medium for amplification. I hope in not so distance future only Kolaveri ( Murderous rage) is reserved for the likes of Dhanush and people learn to take things in stride and live life "Gangnam Style".

It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. In fact have the wisdom to reject hateful thoughts.

Rise

This post on The Dark Knight Rises (TDKR) is long due now, one of the reasons to wait so long was not seem like a crazed fan-boy ( which off course I am ).   TDKR is a movie event I have been awaiting for the last 4 years after the Dark Knight which was a mind blowing movie which is the Gold Standard for a super hero movie. 

TDKR definitely was a good movie, not as enthralling or having memorable dialogues like its predecessor, the problem being no one could figure out what the hell Bane was saying behind his mask.  The best thing about the movie was the ending which still intrigues me even today, weeks after. 

The Batman actually hangs up his boots and leaves Gotham for good. A superhero who has had enough.  The Batman / Bruce Wayne unlike other superheros like Clark Kent / Peter Parker is not from a humble background or gifted with super powers.  The Batman was never about hope, it was always about channelizing his guilt of being an unwilling part in his parent's death because of his fear of bats. 

The Batman must surely go down in comic book history as one of the most clinically depressed, brooding superheroes who derived no peace in saving Gotham or putting criminals behind bars. 

Christopher Nolan through his Batman trilogy does give Bruce Wayne the perfect arc, starts off as an angry jock, finds his purpose in life in Batman Begins, encounters the Joker and the death of Rachel pushes him off the edge in the Dark Knight and finally in the third  installment he rises above his pain, guilt and anger to save Gotham and himself.

Both Harvey Dent and Bruce Wayne were great men but how each dealt with his pain made the difference, Bruce used his pain for good whilst Dent went down a destructive path. Eventually even Bruce had to move on. 

Remember no pain remains forever, no obligations or burden needs to be borne for eternity, no-one or nothing is irreplaceable ... not even The Dark Knight. 

Guide – An Enduring Classic

The Guide (1965 ) is based on the novel by R.K Narayan who also wrote the Malgudi Days, the movie adaption directed by Vijay Anand and stars Dev Anand-Waheeda Rahman in stellar performances.

Plot Summary 
Guide is about Raju (Dev Anand) who is a tourist guide and his complex relationship with Rosie (Waheeda Rahman) who is a woman trapped in an unhappy marriage with Marco
who is an archaeologist obsessed with his work.

Rosie turns suicidal but Raju comes into her life and helps her break free from her husband and mentors her to become a classical dancer with great success. They start living together which alienates Raju's family. Eventually his insecurities and access to instant wealth makes him jealous and gets  intimidated by her success. In a moment of indiscretion, he commits a forgery and he gets jailed and the difference of opinions drives a wedge in the relationship of Rosie and Raju. 

Once Raju leaves jail instead of returning to Rosie or his family, he runs away and he is mistaken for a saint in a village. Eventually due to a drought, the villagers persuade him to undertake a 12 day fast to evoke the rain Gods. 

Rosie, his mother and friends try persuading him to give up his fast but he refuses as he does not want to break the faith of the villagers. Eventually the faith of villagers is rewarded and Raju dies in the end but in the end after achieving true peace of mind and transforming from a man to an ideal.  

Takeaways from the Movie  

The first and most daring plot device of a woman in an unhappy marriage and her courage to walk out and have an affair with another man. For the 1960's India it was tremendous leap ahead to show a live in relation between Raju and Rosie. 

Secondly Rosie's pursuit of her dreams to become a dancer and how that leads to souring of her relationship with Raju who eventually succumbs to the typical insecurities. The depiction of an imperfect relationship is quite a refreshing change to the typical goody two shoes romances of the 60's Hindi cinema. 

Thirdly when Raju goes to the village, the depiction of rural India, abject poverty and the willingness of the masses to follow anyone as a spiritual guide / leadership. The rich have the luxury to entertain ideas of atheism and the triumph of science over religion but for the poor, only faith in a higher power God is the only comfort to live on another day. 

Fourthly the movie deals is the exploration of Hindu beliefs of the eternal soul and impermanent body, so when finally Raju dies for the village, it is not an unpleasant choice but actually an evolution in his mindset. The transformation of a impostor to an spiritual being is quite plausible and engaging.

Guide as the Metaphor 

The “Guide” is quite the metaphor, in the first phase, Raju is 'Tourist Guide' guiding people as his work, then he becomes 'Guide-Mentor' to Rosie to end her unhappy marriage and also become a successful dancer. The Third phase of his life is 'Guide-Guru' to the masses as the spiritual Guru. But the most significant transformation as 'Guide to Himself' when he is able to rise above his ego, attachments and pettiness to sacrifice his life for the people.

In the name of 'Bold' movies we are subjected to semi-pornographic movies these days but to be honest, Guide sans skin show was a bold, unconventional movie.  

Words do not do enough to describe this great classic of Indian cinema, I recommend you the reader to catch it soon. 

Why do we worry??

An experimental post - I tried using the 5 Why technique to find the root cause of a common problem of worrying.

Why do we worry?

Because we feel we lack control of our destiny  

Why do we feel the lack of control?

Because our plans don’t seem to work at all

Why don’t our plans work?

Because we cannot control things like the economy, people, family problems and other acts of God.

Can we control factors which are outside of our control?

No we need to have patience and wait for things to unfold!

Then why do we lack patience?

It is a lack of faith in our abilities.

Is Faith very important?

The best is to believe in a higher power like benevolent God or at least believe in yourself.

In a terrible situation we lose faith in ourselves and in doing so we also lose confidence in our skills and become a pale shadow of our former selves.

Its remarkable when you need courage the most, we fail. So the only answer to problems in life is having patience, by patience I don’t mean you put up with rubbish but wait enough time for your plans to succeed.

Indeed there will be days when patience will wear thin, those are the days you need to reach out to your friends and family.  Only our true can re-enforce the trust and remind us of our true abilities.

Even Lord Hanuman needed to be reminded of his true nature and skills before He could travel to Lanka to find Sita.

So never be lonely and keep your friends and family close and off course keep the faith

Personal Branding in Public Life

All of us in India and the NRI diaspora witnessed the Anna Hazare phenomenon and in spite of a few detractors but Anna has gathered a cult following and a credibility not shared by his contemporaries in activism Do names like T.N Seshan (Former Chief Election Commissioner )  or G.R Khairnar ( Former Mumbai Municipal Commissioner)  even ring a bell now. 

If you think about it what differentiates an Abdul Kalam from K. Kasturiragan (ISRO), Nehru from Sadar Patel, Manmohan Singh from Pranab Mukerjee or an Atal Bihari Vajpayee from Narsimha Rao. It is the role of personal branding, showcasing an unique eccentricity or quality which differentiates an individual from the other.

Single Status

A person who chooses to stay un-married in political life always seems to have an upper hand in public life and greater acceptability may it be Atal Bihari Vajpayee, Narendra Modi, Anna Hazare or the lady brigade of Jaya, Mamta and Maya.

A distinct Look/Accessory

Be it Manmohan Singh's blue turban, Gandhi's Dhoti, Anna's Topi or Dr APJ Abdul Kalam's funky hair-do or Hilter's Chaplinesqe moustache, having a distinct look creates a lasting image in the minds of the people.

An Armed forces Background

I am sure in all the forwards which glorified Anna Hazare all of them began with the line “Anna Hazare was a solider in the Indian Army ( he was a driver but that's besides the point). George Bush also had a military background which he leveraged well in political campaigns. 

The notion of sacrificing one's life for the country instantly improves the personal brand quotient.

Catchy Slogans/Simple Messaging

The problem with intellectuals like P.V Narsimha Rao, T.N Seshan they speak too long and don't simplify  the message. People do not like to be burdened with the complexity of life, they want a quick fix which is easily understandable. 

• Anna Hazare – Jan lok pal, Anti Corruption
• Obama – Yes we can
• Sonia Gandhi – Aam Aadmi
• Narendra Modi – Gujrat Astima, Vibrant Gujrat

Every one loves an underdog - “Not so priveleged background”

People who come from a tough / poverty stricken or a socially disadvantaged background gain a lot from the sympathy. Any message from a leader from this category automatically gains more credibility vis-a-vis a candidate from a more affluent background.

The debate is already skewed toward the street smart vis-a-vis the Ivy League or the IITian from a middle or upper middle class background. 

Inheritance of a grand legacy

It is also helpful if you can lay claim to an illustrious legacy, the easiest way is off course being born into one like Rahul Gandhi or Omar Abdullah. But the smarter individuals are those who can appropriate them directly from another individual. 

• Jayalalitha – MGR legacy
• Anna Hazare – The Gandhian Way
• Mayawati – The Kanchi Ram/Lower Caste Mobilization
• Abdul Kalam – Success of the Pokhran Nuclear Tests

Intellectuals lose out because they look too much like PLU ( people like us)

Inherently people of India or people in general appreciate a mystical quality and a persona which is not common, so speaking slowly or dressing up in suits / formal clothing will never make the cut. 

Although we may not admit it but its all about the branding. 

5 Cs of Relationships

As I see most of my peer group from school, college and colleagues finally settling down in matrimony, it takes me back a long time to my teenage days when this fascination for getting into a perfect relationship first germinated.

The endless discussions with friends on love marriage versus arranged marriage and what qualities you look for in your life partner questions were done to death those days. Many die-hard proponents of love marriage ended up in proper matrimony suggested by parents and incredibly some seeda-saada chupe rustoms ended up with life partners of their choice. ( No names here :) )

As brash youngsters we start life imagining we have all the answers and total control of our lives; Only with time and experience the truth dawns on us, its not so simple. Sitcoms like How I Met your Mother and F.R.I.E.N.D.S play on the question which  is on the mind of very single person on this planet – 

When will I meet the right person and more importantly how will I know ?.

There is a romantic answer when it happens when it happens but as a Engineer/MBA I had to drill it down to a formula. ( ya right :P )

Here goes 5 Cs of the perfect relationship

Chemistry:- The first spark in any relationship is the irresistible attraction which is often irrational when hormones begin to rage. Chemistry has a role to play in a relationship, unfortunately people attach to much importance to it than needed as youth/looks are transient.  

Compatibility:- I never believe the old adage opposites attract. A shared context and values which can take a relationship forward when the heady attraction subsides. The question comes into my mind is do you see yourself with this person 50 years from now.

Convergence:- Sometimes we meet the right kind of person and we do seem to get along like fire but then unfortunately there is no convergence in goals or dreams. Such kind of relationships are quite troublesome while you do want to make them work but the burden of killing your dreams doesn't make them worth it. Long distance relationships often brings in long lasting cracks instead.

Communication: In every relationship, there are bound to be disagreements and small annoying flaws, but the only way to deal with them is open dialogue and communication. Talking aloud makes all the difference. I am not saying ranting and going ballistic is going to help, but soft spoken objective interactions can go a long way in soothing nerves and making that difference.

Conviction: People today lack the patience and conviction to make a relationship work. Its all lovey-dovey at first, but at the first sign of trouble, people crumble and seek the exit route. This only leads to a series of unfulfilled relationships which leaves one emotionally exhausted. In life there are bound to be ups and downs, it is better to have that one anchored relationship which can help you navigate through life instead of drifting aimlessly.

Finally be it a man or a woman have faults, its remarkable how two imperfect beings seek a perfect relationship. But by adhering these 5 principles, any relationship can be improved greatly.

Love, Friends and Sitcoms

One interesting thing to notice regarding the themes running common in the most popular sitcoms in the era :- F.R.I.E.N.D.S , How I met your Mother and Coupling ( BBC Brit Comedy I am addicted to these days) is love and friendship. Why are these two themes so universal, I guess the reason is that these are two relationships which a person chooses for himself and it is not imposed by him by nature or society. 

It is also bit ironic, that the relations in which we have the greatest freedom to choose, makes us the most vulnerable. These are the relationships which give us the greatest joy and despair. Guess, that is the price we have to pay for the freedom.

The inspiration for this post is me watching back to back episodes of How I met your Mother season II for past 2 weekends which I finished shortly before starting this post. So the main characters in this serial really represent the various views people hold regarding a relationship. 

Ted – Who believes in true love and the concept of finding the one and yes bit unlucky in love

Robin – an independent woman who finds commitment and marriage unacceptable

Lily and Marshall – The college sweethearts who have been eternally together and symbol of true love for all other friends in the group. I guess we all have such a couple in our friend circles although you do admire them but there is always a tinge of envy if we too could find some one special like that.

Barney - A chronic bachelor who loves the single life who seems shallow and callous on the surface but does have a warm side as good friend who however is cynical towards the some one special concept.

The season 2 beings with Lily and Marshall broken up and Ted and Robin getting together. The journey sees ups and downs for both couples with Lily and Marshall getting married whilst Ted and Robin breaking up for good at the end of season.

One more interesting dimension of this serial, it is set in the future Ted telling his children how he met their mother. It is known to the viewers that Robin is not the some one special but Ted does not know that yet and he believes in the magic of this current relationship and goes through it with smiles and tears on the way. 

The beauty of the serial lies in the fact the true identity of the mother is never revealed but it always ends with the promise of a better tomorrow for Ted.

Life often does not follow plans perfectly but it often turns out more perfect than planned. Keep the faith ! 

There is a Dev D in all of us somewhere ….

Needless to say, my last weekend's watch was Dev D and it was not a waste of my money or time. Although I would not call it a classic by any stretch of imagination but definitely it is a creative fare with wonderful music and contemporary story telling avoiding cliches in the narrative. The most refreshing aspects was the characterization, the choices reflect free will, in cases people may seem flawed but still no one seeks refuge behind the excuse of fate or family pressure.

The character of Dev D does not create any sympathy for himself and rightly so. He is a selfish, pathetic arrogant soul who gets his just desserts. Paro is fiesty and quickly moves on her life without brooding too long. Anyways I do not want in more detail about the movie as it already has great reviews and I do not want to add to that list.

Coming to the question, why is Dev D the ninth adaption of the old novel about a coward who did not have the guts to fight for his love and dies a broke alcoholic so appealing to the film makers and film goers as well.

Possible reasons why Dev D is so popular

• He is extremely arrogant and realizes his only folly in hindsight

• He cribs a lot and wallows in self pity

• He is neurotic and guilt trips Paro, his family by his chronic lethargy and self destructive habits

• He gets to booze first thing in the morning ( yeah many people would like that :P am sure )

• He derives pleasure in his own self inflicted pain and assumes he is doing a great sacrifice

In all the reasons, mentioned below many of us have experinced a similar emotion. It may not necessarily a lost love (GF/BF variety), It could be missing out on a dream job, vacation or promotion. Although conventional wisdom suggests we should dust ourselves and keep moving on, there is a morbid pleasure in cribbing and lying on the floor and drawing self sympathy and attention of others.

The overdosing need not be just be on alcohol, it can be over focusing on the job, excessive shopping or even calling up friends/family and restating the same old story on how tragic your life is. In this sorrow you find the purpose of your life, that you are alone in the world and you alone have faced such a calamity. In some way the world, God is against you and you are being victimized. This feeling makes you feel important and wanted some how. Any kind of advice sane or otherwise is just brushed off and you continue on the same vein. In a way, it is a classic attention seeking behaviour to pander to personal ego.

That is the precise reason, why Dev D is so integral to all of us, he reminds to us how as humans we all are fallible and can be petty enough to be self destructive. Dev D is about been stupid,egoistic and on top of it being proud about it.

As the movie Dev D ended on a surprising happy note, let us also find our own redemption and the inner strength to fight the Dev D in us from entirely taking over our life. Life is tough, it does not become any better with a lousy attitude.

“All of us are lying in a gutter, Only few of us are looking at the stars” - Oscar Wilde

Philosophy from Star Trek

Couple of days back I caught the new Star Trek movie trailer it revived my childhood memories watching the various Star Trek series rather religiously on cable television. Yes, I am one of the confirmed Trekkie geeky clan. 

The reason I really liked Star Trek is the fact it reposes faith on future of humanity unlike the other sci-fi movies like the Matrix, Terminator, Alien, etc which always paint a dark picture for mankind with machines taking over the world. The stories and characters in Star Trek are in ways exploring various moral dilemmas which we even face in today's world in a futuristic setting.  I shall perhaps come up with a more detailed post some other day on how Star Trek changed the world, today I shall be sharing my favorite Star Trek quotes.  

  

Perhaps "because it is there" is not sufficient reason for climbing a mountain 

This is a mistake perhaps most of us do, we never take time to analyse what challenges to pick and just following the first thing we can lay our hands on.... 

A no-win situation is a not a test of your abilities but of your character 

A no-win situation is something all of us have to face in our lives, there is precious little we can do, so instead of getting overworked and losing self confidence is to accept the fact and move on. How we accept defeat is as if not more important how we handle success. 

Pain and guilt are things we carry with us, the things that make us who we are. If we lose them, we lose ourselves

It might be slightly parodoxical why to hang on to our weaknesses, but our failures and unfullfilled aspirations also add to our character and defines our unique nature. We must embrace and not try to escape from them. 

You can commit no mistake and still lose. That is not a weakness. That is life.

I guess it is pretty self explainatory...

What we leave behind is not as important as how we've lived

This is a good point to end this post, sometimes we get so hung on leaving behind a legacy or working too hard for a better future we miss out on the present. 

P.S:  I know this is bit TOO much gyaan but i liked the aliens and spaceships on the show too :)