The Nouveau Rich India

The financial crisis triggered in 2008, which has led on an economic slowdown in the developed countries like the US and Europe while bringing emerging countries like India, China and Brazil with impressive growth rates are finally taking their place in the global table of power.

It is definitely encouraging to see the world is getting more democratized and the days of unipolar hegemony are getting numbered.  When President Obama visited to India and gave a speech that India is no longer an emerging superpower but India has indeed emerged.

The media and the growing middle class are trying their best to gloss over obvious gaps in our quest to recognized a super power (economic or strategic) there are things which India needs to fix before declaring itself a super power.

Crony Capitalism

Isn’t it for India’s first F1 race, govt. is providing subsidized fuel and undertaking land acquisition on behalf of corporates. The fracas in the Greater Noida and scams in CWG and 2G cases showing how dangerous is the collusion between corporate India and govt. to serve self-interests.

Is India a sporting nation beyond cricket?

While India is hosting big ticket events but we are not nourishing enough world beaters or even competitive athletes for world events.  Apart from large cities, there is not even access to basic infrastructure to allow young talent to be recognized and get due attention.

Sluggish Judiciary

The most horrific part of the Indian judicial system is the sluggish pace at which cases are disposed of. The thousands of people who are in jail waiting for trail is indeed shocking. The false accused in the Malegaon blasts spent 5 years in jail before been released as innocents. Before we call ourselves a superpower, judicial and police reforms are needed.

Crumbling Infrastructure

The biggest gripe, basic roads and public transport is a mirage. As IT companies are moving to suburbs beyond the major cities, like Pune, Chennai, the sluggish pace at which fly-overs and public transportation availability is been made is shocking.  A Mumbai-Pune journey (150 kms) AC bus ticket is Rs 320/- but 10 km ride from the IT park to Pune city costs Rs 250/- . Not to speak of heavy traffic jams.

A combination of local gunda-ism, corruption in infrastructure projects and general apathy by municipal authorities are making daily office commutes a nightmare.

Are we been Nouveau Rich?

Instead of focusing on real issues or trying to find solutions, India is operating on misplaced priorities, instead of looking at basics, we are trying to showcase to the world about its status as a superpower, the outward focus instead of working hard on solving problems for its own people.

Instead of aping the glitzy/easier symbols of the developed nations like a F-1 race or building large malls, we should look to strengthen our infrastructure, local governance and access to basic amenities of life.  

When there are so many people in India going without two square meals in a day or access to water and healthcare, the excessive focus on glitz seems a lot like French Queen Marie Antoinette “Let them eat cake” 

News Channels Today - Peddling Aspirations or Pure Denial ?

if you follow the news channels in India regularly apart from the politician bashing you will probably be seeing these headlines getting repeated over time with some small variations. 

China fixation / India Superpower
if you see experts in TV studios you would believe India is a superpower and developed nation which is just days from a permanent seat in UN security council. In its flight of fantasy it needs to match China in military prowess and pursue an aggressive foreign policy. 

 Pubs/Alcohol Age 

 If you followed the news about actor Imran Khan who is opposing the increased official age of drinking to 25 as an affront to the freedom of Indians ( I guess adding the right to booze to the Constitution is really the need of the hour) and the draconian laws in Bangalore pubs of shutting down too early.

 IIT / St Stephens fixation 

 Another key headline is the entire IIT debate of Narayan Murthy and Chetan Bhagat and about the quality of students from our premier institutions. Reams of news print and air time spend on discussing mostly Chetan Bhagat's point of view ( not by co-coincidence He is having a book launch soon ) Offcourse some or the other stories about St. Stephens, I am quite surprised that Mani Shankar Aiyer got away easy with his Hansraj BA pass remark on Sports Minister Ajay Makhan. 

 Exclusive Interviews with Actors 

 Another trend is the interviews with actors, its a win win because its easy TRPs and no efforts to research or report and for the actors like SRK, Ranbir Kapoor good marketing for their up coming releases. 

 Reading out Twitter Posts 

 Is it even a real journalist job, reading out twitter posts ?? Actually Twitter is the best thing which happened to 24X7 journalists, verified soundbytes ( 140 characters ) delivered on your smartphone by the celebs. 

 Over Simplification / News for Dummies 

 Even the issue of Rs 32 as the poverty line demarcator was taken as another opportunity to bash the political class but never little attempt made to understand the rationale or economics behind it. In case of the Anna Hazare campaign, some news channels were taking sides with the outraged middle class instead of an objective news analysis. 

 Always going soft on corporates 

 Of all talk of corruption in India, the media is deliberately soft on corporates because one negative report on the house of Tatas or a Reliance will result in massive drop in advertising revenues. Secondly to make the middle class comfortable that paying bribes is because of the system and off load own guilt by blaming only the netas and bureaucrats. 

 

 Is it a delibrate denial ?

Clearly the news and media channels are not naïve or blundering idiots to not having to pick up real issues and deleve deeper (expect CNN-IBN's Karan Tharpar show The Last Word and some shows on NDTV) rest of the News channels just want to indulge the Indian middle class fixation with institutions of higher education, the fantasy of India taking on China and fueling the need become a more materialistic consumerism driven society.

There is a clear whitewashing of the stories of the poor India, health care and rising inflation. For the new middle class paying 1000 Rs to a domestic help is much costly than spending the same at a spa or a pub is not a problem. The increasing hedonistic mindset of the affluent class whilst lack of sensitivity towards the less fortunate is indeed disturbing. The media shows us what we want to see rose tinted picture hiding all details 

that which can make us uncomfortable.

The role of news media has changed from enlightening and educating the viewers to engaging and entertaining but in the race for TRPs and showing quarterly profits, can we blame the media or do we as a society need to evolve as well.

Personal Branding in Public Life

All of us in India and the NRI diaspora witnessed the Anna Hazare phenomenon and in spite of a few detractors but Anna has gathered a cult following and a credibility not shared by his contemporaries in activism Do names like T.N Seshan (Former Chief Election Commissioner )  or G.R Khairnar ( Former Mumbai Municipal Commissioner)  even ring a bell now. 

If you think about it what differentiates an Abdul Kalam from K. Kasturiragan (ISRO), Nehru from Sadar Patel, Manmohan Singh from Pranab Mukerjee or an Atal Bihari Vajpayee from Narsimha Rao. It is the role of personal branding, showcasing an unique eccentricity or quality which differentiates an individual from the other.

Single Status

A person who chooses to stay un-married in political life always seems to have an upper hand in public life and greater acceptability may it be Atal Bihari Vajpayee, Narendra Modi, Anna Hazare or the lady brigade of Jaya, Mamta and Maya.

A distinct Look/Accessory

Be it Manmohan Singh's blue turban, Gandhi's Dhoti, Anna's Topi or Dr APJ Abdul Kalam's funky hair-do or Hilter's Chaplinesqe moustache, having a distinct look creates a lasting image in the minds of the people.

An Armed forces Background

I am sure in all the forwards which glorified Anna Hazare all of them began with the line “Anna Hazare was a solider in the Indian Army ( he was a driver but that's besides the point). George Bush also had a military background which he leveraged well in political campaigns. 

The notion of sacrificing one's life for the country instantly improves the personal brand quotient.

Catchy Slogans/Simple Messaging

The problem with intellectuals like P.V Narsimha Rao, T.N Seshan they speak too long and don't simplify  the message. People do not like to be burdened with the complexity of life, they want a quick fix which is easily understandable. 

• Anna Hazare – Jan lok pal, Anti Corruption
• Obama – Yes we can
• Sonia Gandhi – Aam Aadmi
• Narendra Modi – Gujrat Astima, Vibrant Gujrat

Every one loves an underdog - “Not so priveleged background”

People who come from a tough / poverty stricken or a socially disadvantaged background gain a lot from the sympathy. Any message from a leader from this category automatically gains more credibility vis-a-vis a candidate from a more affluent background.

The debate is already skewed toward the street smart vis-a-vis the Ivy League or the IITian from a middle or upper middle class background. 

Inheritance of a grand legacy

It is also helpful if you can lay claim to an illustrious legacy, the easiest way is off course being born into one like Rahul Gandhi or Omar Abdullah. But the smarter individuals are those who can appropriate them directly from another individual. 

• Jayalalitha – MGR legacy
• Anna Hazare – The Gandhian Way
• Mayawati – The Kanchi Ram/Lower Caste Mobilization
• Abdul Kalam – Success of the Pokhran Nuclear Tests

Intellectuals lose out because they look too much like PLU ( people like us)

Inherently people of India or people in general appreciate a mystical quality and a persona which is not common, so speaking slowly or dressing up in suits / formal clothing will never make the cut. 

Although we may not admit it but its all about the branding. 

Do not let Ajmal Kasab Win !

I swore to myself after the 13/7 bomb blasts in Mumbai, I would not write a post on this topic. People including myself experienced the deja vu feelings after 26/11 and I went on a rant on whats going wrong , there has been little progress but not good enough to prevent such an unfortunate incident.

People are enraged and even more cynical than ever, that is understandable. We want our government and police to do much more, we have all the rights to demand action. 

But instead of addressing the key issues of better policing, improving intelligence networks and how to isolate Pakistan in the international community and people are taking increasingly alarmist positions. 

Subramanium Swamy's Xenophobic views

Dr. Subramanium Swamy who claims to be the one who exposed the 2G scam and speaks of several credentials and a known Sonia Gandhi hater wrote on a piece in DNA  and suggested steps like declaring India as Hindu Rashtra and demolishing mosques as possible solutions to solving the problem.

This bigoted appoarch will create further cracks in our society and push India towards a horrific future.

Kasab and Madani enjoying in Jail

Another mischievous track which began in news papers and blogs is how Indians ( particularly Hindus) are suffering while elements like Kasab, Madani and Afzal Guru are having a great time in jail. Another carnard, sure there has been some delays some justified and some unjustified but instead of seeing Muslims in India as part of our own nation, isolating them is so unfair.

Migrants are the problem

Raj Thackeray playing to the gallery and trying to isolate Mumbai from the rest of the country, also the limited point that we need more policing and focus, there are enough criminal elements who have been born and bred in Maharashtra itself, there is no need to point fingers at northern states.

All Indians who attended Ghulam Nabi Fai's conferences are traitors

It has emerged recented that Mr. Ghulam Nabi Fai a lobbyist in Washington DC who organized conferences on Kashmir issue was on the pay roll of ISI to propogate Pakistan's agenda. Many number of Indian journalists and illuminaries attended such conferences, now an attempt is being made all of them colluded and hence guilty by association they are all traitors.

Shocking indeed, people are ready to buy into the Islamphobia and start dividing the country on religious lines again. No country which is ready to buy into an xenophobic theory cannot be going on the right path, as tommorrow people will even condole rights and ethitic cleansing/geocides.

I dont know when Ajmal Kasab will be even hanged, but I know the terrorists will win if we get divided and fall into the spiral of hate and fear. 

Dont let Ajmal Kasab win and dont let the multi cultural plurality of India get destroyed by the lunatic fringe elements. 

P.S: I recently read that the AIMPLB ( Muslim Body) is planning to protest the Indian Govt. proposal to make right to education a compulsory right and several Madrassas could get de-recognized as they dont have minimum facilities. I hope the government of India does not give into the pressure of vote bank politics. The standards how we judge religious intolerance must be the same for all. 

How Twitter killed the Movie Star

Once upon a time, we had film actors on a pedestal and people would buy film magazines like Film-fare and Star Dust to get the latest dope on them and there was just one channel Doordarshan which ran programs like Chaya-Geet, Chitrahaar and Rangoli which ran songs for half an hour once a week.  Movies ran for weeks and a movie was certified a hit on number of days at the box office. 

Film stars were exclusive in fact reclusive and people craved for attention and information. But that was the year 1991 and now it’s 2011. In the last 20 years, the business of movie making has changed its all about the first weekend and the multiplex audience.  There are so many pressures to market the movie on all traditional mediums and social media channels.


 It is like carpet bombing basically;you cannot miss the cast of the latest big blockbuster on telly, radio, new channels, news papers, TV shows and internet. 


A set of Twitter species has emerged from Bollywood in the new order. A sample below:- 

•  Out of Work Actor/Actresses: There are so many out of work actors/actresses who have precious little to do expect cut some ribbons and becoming good will ambassadors for some events. They keep tweeting about “Love NY”; “awesome Toronto” or "Go Deccan Chargers" to let people know they are still alive.

• Burned out directors/actors: There are 45+ year old burned out gentlemen who are born again social activists who support Anna Hazare and Ramdev in their fight against corruption and black money but won’t make a peep about the string of actresses getting caught in airports for customs violations

• PR junkies: There are unapologetic guileless actors/authors who wake up before a movie/book release and keep tweeting links, new coverage and tit-bits about their upcoming release. Cultivate a positive image to increase twitter followers count and keep advertising it. ( 100 K followers today, 400 K tomorrow)
• Pure Attention Seekers: There are some people who are so desperate for your attention and will tweet sensational junk. There is a director known for his underworld movies who said he will offer a movie to Maria Susiraj ( the girl involved in the Neeraj Grover case) and yesterday was using cuss words to praise Big B's latest movie.

One cannot really help but pity these people from the film industry;Twitter robs them of the sheen and the mystic they once had. You see them for what they really are, human beings just like us, insecure, petty, confused, biased, vain, hypocritical and mostly boring. 

Damn Twitter killed the movie star. I hate Twitter for that.

P.S: 1 Rajnikant has no Twitter account neither does he endorse any brands and doesn’t gives exclusive interviews. He is a bald 65 years old  man who seems mostly like the uncle next door but when he dons the grease paint he becomes and always will be the SUPER-STAR. 

P.S: 2   If you are regular on Twitter you will know whom I am talking about :) 

Why the Civil society must realise there are no quick fixes

As I write this post, the second indefinite fast to death has been started by Baba Ramdev Yoga guru and star of Aastha channel in his struggle against black money.Predictably there time around there is viewer fatigue as we just emerge from Anna Hazare's campaign against corruption took place in Jantar Mantar which was described by eager beaver journalists as India's Tahir Square moment and Anna Hazare as the next Mahatma.

Both eulogies are over exaggerations and India is a not a banana republic or run by despots like Murabarak or Saddam Hussein or Col. Gaddafi. I have read the Jan Lok Pal and it has some major naive assumptions and some cunning clauses to get permanent authority to civil society members without accountability. I doubt how many of us have really read the Jan lok pal draft before deciding to support Anna Hazare.


Points I disagree on the Jan Lok Pal Draft - full draft link

• Lokpal will collect 10% fine on each case of corruption detected and it goes to a Lok pal fund which will disbursed to improve Lokpal infrastructure - (undermine the financial/fiscal responsibility of the govt.) 
• Selection committee to include all Nobel laureates of Indian origin - ( why should people like V.S Naipaul, Prof Venkat Ramkrishnan and Dr. Amartya Sen who have long left India to pursue own interests aboard be allowed to part of such a key decision making process) 
• Selection committee to include Last 3 Magsaysay award winners - ( no surprises includeArvind Kejriwal, P. Sainath and Kiran Bedi amongst others) 
• Lokpal be a super cop, quasi judiciary and even hand out sentences demean all the Indian institutions.
• Section 27 – Protection where the Lok Pal will have complete judicial immunity for acts of good faith - (such a naive assumption Lok pal will be above aboard in such a so called corrupt nation) 

Points I disagree with Anna Hazare 

• Indian Constitution and institutions are so rotten that we need a new extra-constitutional body to be pointed by persons having external accreditation's from Nobel Prize and Magsaysay awards
• The assumption all our elected representatives are corrupt and Indian voters are not sensible enough to vote for the right candidate. Mr. Hazare said if he stood in an election he would lose his deposit
• His flip flops on Narendra Modi shows his lack of a consistent political view
• His left wing friends like Swami Agnivesh who is a known Maoist sympathizer and Medha Patkar a known anti dam/development activist who have agendas of their own

Points I disagree with Baba Ramdev List of Baba Ramdev's demands

• his bizarre demand to ban 500 and 1000 rupee notes, and to declare an ordinance on bringing back black money to India and promoting Hindi at the expense of English . With due respect he is no expert on economics.
• his clear right wing linkage with the RSS and people who were involved in the Ram janam bhoomi moment like Sadhvi Ritammbara 
• He is still to come clean on his source of wealth, his private jets and 18 crore 5 star satyagraha at Ram lila maidan. 

Points I disagree with Arundhati Roy

• her constant glorification of the Maoist moment knowing full well bloodshed is never a long term solution is mischievous and dangerous.
• her support to the Kashmiri separatist moment, in fact she seceded from the Indian republic and declared her self an independent mobile republic way back in 1998.

The cure worse than the disease ??
I agree government has been losing credibility and instead of an constructive opposition which can take on the govt. the fringe voices like Anna Hazare, Baba Ramdev and people like Arundhati Roy are getting even more footage and media space. My greatest fear is these misguided “civil society” members are wanting quick fixes and little accountability, and by targeting the political class institutions there are only creating anarchy in the nation.

I agree there is rampant accountability issues with the political class but the ballet gives us the opportunity to make a change. Democracy is still the best way forward.You need to toil and work closely on the ground, Mamata Banerjee's example of her diligent efforts to end the 34 years of the Left rule. Off course time will decide Mamata's legacy but for a woman with no god fathers and no corruption charges on her as of now yet she represents to me a glimmer of hope and trust on Indian democracy.

I strongly feel before we run out and start chasing any leader proposing a quick fix to nation problems and using anarchy instead of working to strengthen the Indian democracy we must question their motives and tactics as much as we distrust the political class.

With all respect I invite the leaders of the civil society to engage the Indian voters directly and enter the political system to gain authority and accountability of all Indians.It may take 10-20 years not a 5 day media circus to affect real change. 

 
Fasting for complex nations issues is not going to solve issues as quickly as eating fast food.

The faceless and silent Indians

The booming India middle class indulges in itself in luxury goods and foreign holidays, there is a class of Indian who are watching by silently. The maid servants,drivers and security staff, these often faceless people are facing life with a quiet dignity.

As India continues to shine and business news channel mull over issues like FDI, Sensex and corporate transitions  and discussions on how Inflation and petrol prices which we crib about idle Sunday evening chit-chats, the face is inflation hurts the slient Indians much more badly than us.  Over the years, I have had some interesting interactions which have stayed with me for long.

Security Guard outside a cyber kiosk (2002)

Star Wars – Attack of Clones had released, I used to frequent a government cyber / information kiosk which allowed 15 mins of free Internet surfing which was a big thing for an engineering student with limited pocket money. Once I was waiting for my turn, the security guard around 22-23 years began an interesting discussion on Maya graphics software and how animation was going to change Indian IT in the near term. He told you see the crowds in the Clone war they are all animated and there was no need for extras like they used in Mughal-e-Azam. He said he was saving up money to attend a Maya course and change his life.

I don't know if he did manage to enter the animation field eventually or succeed, but I loved the zeal in his eyes and his unwillingness to resign himself to a fate of a security guard.

Pickpocket in Mysore (2004)

Funny experience, I was in Mysore and had gone to drop my parents off at the bus stand. The bus stand was fairly crowded, since it was early morning I didn't take my wallet and was in my track pants without pockets. A pickpocket tried his luck and didn't find a pocket to pick. I quickly looked around at him and gave him a look, he gave me a sly smile, shrugged his shoulders and disappeared into the crowd.

Damn funny, an interesting day in the life of a pickpocket, you win some and lose some.

Cab driver in Bangalore (2009)

I met a very chatty and garrulous Tamilian cab driver, as I was leaving Bangalore and he was so interested in my life and admonished me for not getting married yet and predicted by next year 2010, I would be married ( which turned out correct). He spoke about the time he was a personal driver in Mumbai and Chennai and how becoming a cab driver in fleet taxis is far comfortable with medical benefits and steady incomes. In fact he mentioned fleet cabs today are looking for steady reliable drivers and they are indeed paid well and not over worked. In fact he wanted his son to join the cab fleet, he is a B.Com graduate and wants to do a MCA or MBA. He also asked me about prospects in the IT industry.

An extremely talkative but mind at peace sort of person, I really wish his son succeeds in life and doesn't need to become a taxi cab driver like his father.

Auto wala in Mumbai (2010)

I met an auto driver in Chembur and he said once he was plying near Ghatkopar during monsoons and visibly disturbed old man asked him to take him to a hospital near Sion. He said its not possible as the water logging is intense and vehicle will get stuck. The elderly man said please take me, my mother is unwell and I am ready to pay Rs 500 for 40 bucks ride.

The auto walla said no saab, not need for the extra money and took the guy to the hospital. It also turned out the lady needed continuous blood transfusions and since auto wala was a local Shiv-Sainik, he contacted the blood donor group and ensured enough donors for the elderly man.

The elderly man was actually a senior trustee in a reputed educational institute and promised the driver an confirmed admissions for his kids as sign of gratitude as the auto wala did not accept money as reward.

The auto driver has been able to put 2 of his children and one nephew in one of Mumbai well known colleges with little cost. This amazing tale really amazes me how a kind deed comes back multi fold.

Maid in Pune (2011)

We have a maid in Pune and she makes rotis for lunch at work. One day, we had run out of atta ( wheat flour) and I hadn't found time to buy the same. We assumed today no chappatis and behold our maid brings atta from her home. She was hesitant and asked us if we would eat flour from her house as she knew we had run out of atta. She was apprehensive as caste barriers still exist in society. We were amazed by her kindness and accepted her offer.

This act really touched me and till today, I think its a great example of going beyond the call of duty. Instead of taking a day off, she had the heart to share her food with us.

Conclusion

The Indian middle class is doing well and has little to complain yet we find so much misery in our lives but there is a large section which struggling to make ends meet, instead of cynicism and envy, they contastly surprise us with enthusiasm. The rich class often treat them with disdain, we don't mind spending thousands in malls and clothes but if a maid wants a 200 rupees raise or day off on Diwali, we throw a fit.

Whenever I see building Kachra wali (housekeeper) an elderly lady clearing the dust bins with toothless smile or the milk man who listens to bhajans on his cell phone loudly and delivering milk with a smile, I realize there is a better work ethic and instead of running the rat race, enjoy the moment and spread joy to people we come in touch in our day to day lives.  

Pointless things people (even me) did on Orkut

Last week, I got a blast from the past; I received an orkut friend request from an old acquaintance, its been ages since I accessed orkut page much less connect with anyone. This made think about the old days when orkut was a rage and how Indians got the first taste of social networking ( it was simply called orkutting back then :P )

How many scraps do you have ??

People actually kept count of the scraps on their profile and cheered on when they hit land marks like 1000, 2000 etc. Any guy/gal with 5000 scraps was popular but someone with 10,000 scraps was a orkut super-star.

Profile visit kiya but scrap nahi kiya

The creepy feature of orkut allowed you to note people who visited your profile recently, and people took serious offense to not been scrapped when someone left their digital footprint on their profile.

Sugary sweet testimonials

the extension of the how many scraps syndrome was how many testimonials do I have, emotional blackmail and quid-pro-quo ensured. But on the other hand, it did make for cheap thoughtful birthday gifts ;) get it “on your birthday, I really wanna share ….”.

Increasing Fans on orkut

I know one particular friend of mine who would become fans of all people in the friend list, so that even 50% reciprocity would ensure he/she would become the most Fanned person.

Wanna be fraindship

as a guy, I wasn't so bothered but girls got hit on so often with unsolicited friendship requests from English murdering desis :)

Today, orkut has become a sort of relic, with facebook and twitter ruling the roost today, but orkut had its dream run in the days of clunky assembled desktops and seedy cyber cafes. Now we have neat 3G and GPRS smartphones. 

Cheers to the initial heady days of social networking!  

5 Cs of Relationships

As I see most of my peer group from school, college and colleagues finally settling down in matrimony, it takes me back a long time to my teenage days when this fascination for getting into a perfect relationship first germinated.

The endless discussions with friends on love marriage versus arranged marriage and what qualities you look for in your life partner questions were done to death those days. Many die-hard proponents of love marriage ended up in proper matrimony suggested by parents and incredibly some seeda-saada chupe rustoms ended up with life partners of their choice. ( No names here :) )

As brash youngsters we start life imagining we have all the answers and total control of our lives; Only with time and experience the truth dawns on us, its not so simple. Sitcoms like How I Met your Mother and F.R.I.E.N.D.S play on the question which  is on the mind of very single person on this planet – 

When will I meet the right person and more importantly how will I know ?.

There is a romantic answer when it happens when it happens but as a Engineer/MBA I had to drill it down to a formula. ( ya right :P )

Here goes 5 Cs of the perfect relationship

Chemistry:- The first spark in any relationship is the irresistible attraction which is often irrational when hormones begin to rage. Chemistry has a role to play in a relationship, unfortunately people attach to much importance to it than needed as youth/looks are transient.  

Compatibility:- I never believe the old adage opposites attract. A shared context and values which can take a relationship forward when the heady attraction subsides. The question comes into my mind is do you see yourself with this person 50 years from now.

Convergence:- Sometimes we meet the right kind of person and we do seem to get along like fire but then unfortunately there is no convergence in goals or dreams. Such kind of relationships are quite troublesome while you do want to make them work but the burden of killing your dreams doesn't make them worth it. Long distance relationships often brings in long lasting cracks instead.

Communication: In every relationship, there are bound to be disagreements and small annoying flaws, but the only way to deal with them is open dialogue and communication. Talking aloud makes all the difference. I am not saying ranting and going ballistic is going to help, but soft spoken objective interactions can go a long way in soothing nerves and making that difference.

Conviction: People today lack the patience and conviction to make a relationship work. Its all lovey-dovey at first, but at the first sign of trouble, people crumble and seek the exit route. This only leads to a series of unfulfilled relationships which leaves one emotionally exhausted. In life there are bound to be ups and downs, it is better to have that one anchored relationship which can help you navigate through life instead of drifting aimlessly.

Finally be it a man or a woman have faults, its remarkable how two imperfect beings seek a perfect relationship. But by adhering these 5 principles, any relationship can be improved greatly.

The Striver and Drifter

Yesterday I watched 2 interesting movies Black Swan and 7 Khoon Maaf. This post is not a movie review per say but looking closer at the title characters played by Natalie Portman (Nina) and Priyanka Chopra (Suzanna) and how they represent 2 distinct character types the striver and the drifter.

The Striver: Nina is a good ballet dancer who has had an unremarkable career for almost 4 years. Her dream is become the lead dancer and achieve glory and perfection. When she gets the dream role her real ordeal begins. The rest of movie looks at how coming so close to achieving her dream changes her equations with her family, friends and her own self worth.

Characteristics of a striver

• Extremely passionate, hardworking and ambitious person 
• The ambition is very lofty and borders on almost unhealthy obsession 
• Unfortunately hard work is no substitute in some cases for raw talent. 
• The person focuses too much on skill/techniques than you stop enjoying life 
• Family and friends become secondary, that you are like a horse with blinkers 
• You lose perspective and unable to handle failure or pressure. 
• A striver often ends up hurting oneself emotionally than any enemy ever could. 

Needless to say, although ambition, drive is essential for one to succeed in one’s chosen field, but an unhealthy obsession doesn’t helps cause. Sometimes person does not even know his/her own key strengths and her purpose in life and may be chasing some fancy or living out a parent’s unfulfilled dreams.

The Drifter: Suzanna is a woman with considerable beauty and wealth at her disposal. In her quest for true love, she constantly re-invents herself to match up to her current husband/lover. E.g.: becoming a rocker girl for her rock star boyfriend, a deep interest in Urdu when she courts a poet. She soon finds something wrong in her life and she kills her husband and but soon enough she is optimistic again to pursue true love.

Characteristics of a drifter

• A distinct lack of an ambition/ focus in life
• Although natural talent helps one achieve his/her short term goals there is no real effort to achieve perfection
• Prone to blame others for one’s problems with a victim complex
• Extremely fickle minded, today want to become a swimmer tomorrow a violin player.
• Unable to break a vicious self destructive pattern in life

The Real world: Although each of us really wants to achieve success in our chosen field, success has several components: - skill, efforts, networking, ability to unlearn and relearn, luck and patience.

Sometimes we may just not have what it takes to reach the pinnacle. Although millions want to become a Sachin Tendulkar or a Roger Federer only a handful will ever reach that space.

But it is certain neither a drifter or a striver will ever be happy in life as their approach is very much skewed. Ironically although a drifter and striver seem very different on the surface but what they are doing is actually the same thing. Having a fixed pattern in life and keep repeating it over and over.

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different result - Albert Einstein

PS: What I really thought about the two movies;
Black Swan an amazing concept well executed and great performance by Natalie Portman and others.
7 Khoon Maaf is tad gimmickry driven, although the premise is interesting it is led down by predictable linear screen play. Although Priyanka Chopra was valiant enough to attempt this but the role was way out of her league.

The travails of the 21st Century workplace

Even though, a young professional of 25-26 years of age earns more than what his/her parent draws as a monthly salary, there is little to suggest there is more happiness or prosperity in today’s life. Just got me wondering in spite of increased salaries and better facilities and a 2 day weekend, what is going so awry?

Longer Work hours

Then: In the old days, it was about punching in 8 hours a day. Come in at 9 am and leave by 5 pm dropping everything in hand.

Now:we have flexi timings – you can come in when you want but cannot leave till your manager wants :P sounds lot like Hotel California.

Competitive Workplace and Title Race

Then: Parents worked years at the same role and looked up to becoming an assistant manage or DGM. Time bound promotions was the norm with no critical appraisals. The title held a lot of respect and honor and it took years to achieve it.

Now: you have 6 monthly appraisals and all your achievements are brushed off and you are told you barely meet expectations and made to fight for your rightful compensation. Funnily titles/ designations are thrown a plenty. How 25-26 years become senior consultants / AVPs are beyond me. 

Where are the perks/benefits really ?

Then: Even if the take home salary in a govt. job, life time pension, job security, access to medical care/insurance and affordable living quarters ensured a higher quality of life.

Now: Although the monthly pay-packet may seem bigger, paying for medical care and financial planning post retirement are big questions which need to be addressed.

Traffic and long commutes

Now: the explosion in traffic and infrastructure projects means it takes longer to commute to and fro. Believe me getting struck in traffic for hours adds to the daily misery after a long day at work.

Financial independence is now taken for granted – since jobs a plenty

Then: Getting a job was tougher, also the Indian economy was growing lot slower and in a license raj driven environment, career advancement was very slow and steady. People were genuinely grateful to be employed.

Now: With job hops and campus placements, people today haven't really seen struggle in their life, financial independence has become much easier;

How to reclaim the happiness and avoid work related stress ?

Increasingly people are turning to alcohol, binge eating, insane partying and shopping to cope with the emptiness in life. A few sensible ones turn to spirituality or new age gurus like Sri Sri and the Art of Living. There is an acknowledgement there needs to more than just professional life in a person's life.

It is important to re view relationships with family, spouse and friends which is losing prominence in 21^st work life culture and make amends. Its ironic when some one is unhappy, he/she stops doing what they love best. Anyway its never too late to re-claim your life.

Pick up again on your hobby, call that old friend and relive the fun times. Take the vacation, learn to worry less, leave office early for a change. Remember money is important but not everything in life. Opt for work from home when possible. Watch movies, read books go for a romantic date, hit a gym, do something for the society. Do solid financial planning and retire soon.

There are 100 different dimensions to you outside to your professional life. Learn to embrace it and set yourself free.

Don't measure everything in terms of Return on Investment but learn to take decisions based on Return on Life - ( Quote reference – Jamal/Quebin)

P.S : I confess I am yet to reach this stage but let today be the first day in my new life.

Who mourns for the little people ?

Few weeks back saw a 1962 B- movie Tarzan goes to India on HBO. It is set in 1920's and how the British Raj is building a dam which is going to destroy villages and destroy the natural habitat of 300 elephants and how Tarzan saves the day. With Feroz Khan and Simi Grewal playing the roles of loyal engineer and princess all the India stereotypes were firmly in place. But 2 points stood out for me in this movie,

• the villain says in large projects like these human life is the cheapest commodity.

• In the end Tarzan saves the elephants and also ensures the dam project is completed to ensure people doesn't suffer from famines in future.

Remarkable nothing has changed, the colonial power now has a corporate face in 2011.

Displacement is not easy; Imagine you have to vacate your home, your locality where you been lived for decades and made to push off to a new place, find new means of employment and resettle your children. The government will compensate you pittance (3-5 Lakhs) and the same place your house once stood will become a real estate gold mine because some automobile or IT company is going to set up shop there will make crores. your sleepy taluka becomes a noisy, bustling place with restaurants and discos to cater to young brats who will spend 5000 rupees for a new year's eve party and that is your monthly income after toiling in the sun in farms.

Economists and business journalists sit n judgment to say its easier to do business in China than in India. The fact is in China people are displaced discreetly without any bad press coverage. But India being the rambunctious democracy has its own unique challenges. Once trouble starts to brew NGOs and politicians who will make noise and draw mileage to themselves. Countless examples from Adarsh, Bangalore land grab by Yedurappa and sons and Narayan Rane clearly shows the connivance of the political class. As tribal rights are violated by mining and steel companies in states like Orissa and Jharkhand Naxalism will continue to rise its vicious head. Suddenly the government is at war against its own people and its a blame game between corporates and local political leaders.

This is battle between 2 Indias, one described by President Obama which are already 'emerged' and the other India which is still 'submerged' to get access to basics like clean water, education and medical care. Its is a battle of greed versus survival with corruption and political patronage suppressing the discordant voices. The difference is getting even starker with each big project may it be a new airport, nuclear power project or campus for new IT company.

There must stronger laws to protect the poor, as land grabbing has become an instrument for illegal wealth creation and politician patronage. While forced displacements for development and progress is inevitable but business houses and governments must eschew greed and arrive at an equitable solution which can take both Indias ahead.

Hoping in the years to come words like sustainability and corporate social responsibilities does not remain just embellished phrases on annual reports and translates into real action. Hoping for a geniune change in 2011.