From the fourth estate to becoming fourth rate !

Last year after the 26/11 attack, I had written a post on the 5 vultures which hound our nation today including politicians, bureaucrats, unfriendly neighbouring countries, media and the finally us the common public who have become apathetic to its surrounding environment.

The year 2009 has particularly one of the above mentioned to falling further from grace that is the media. The Indian media grappling with the new needs of a 24X7 news channel coverage has come to its wits end. The commercialization is so rampant that, they are forced to run feeds of reality shows at non prime time, run interviews of Saif and Kareena on prime time television and also talk about Ashwariya Rai bumping into her ex Salman and Vivek in great gusto.

Ridiculous programming

Apart from this, wild insane programming which talks about the end of the world by the CERN “Maha yantra” (India TV is convinced once the CERN Particle Accelerator is operational, KABOOM end of the world) and other ridiculous stories like Rakhi Sawant par Janta ki mukadama. If you ask the channel people they will say, we give what the people want and that’s what we are giving it to them. Especially the Hindi news channels are more guilty in selling out to cater to the lowest common denominator, but even the English media cannot be claim to be covering themselves in glory. The distinction between a general entertainment channel and a news channel is very little these days.

Anniversary Obsessions

The English media is now obsessed with date and anniversaries; it is an easy method of lazy news coverage, a 26/11, 7/11, 9/11, pull out archive footage, add some dramatic music and ta da … 3 hours of prime time coverage is ready. There is no real introspection of the event, just call politicians names, reopen old scars by asking a husband how he feels about his lost wife and recreate the fearful gloomy atmosphere for all. The coverage is getting elitist; Taj and Trident deaths get more coverage than the deaths at Cama Hospital or CST station. Where were the candle light processions when the July train blasts occurred? Surely some terrorist attacks are not more equal than others.

Crime shows

Crime is another favorite exploited genre which is milked for prime-time viewing; today we are talking about a police commissioner molesting a young tennis player, while the Arushi murder case was dissected to the maximum making the private lives of Dr Talwar n his wife a public mockery. I still remember the remorseless headline of television channel; “Daddy killed Arushi” which they retracted after some hours. This is the kind of irresponsible sensational media coverage we are subjected to these days. Crime coverage is voyeuristic, typical police bashing and case is only followed as long as the public memory lasts and then it becomes another footnote in the television history.

All the same

The argument which you shall get from the news channels is that, if you don’t like then don’t watch, you can surf ahead and watch something else, but then if the catch is its 10.30 all channels air sports content, on a weekend it will be Auto and Gadget shows at the same slot, so you hardly get an option to watch something else anyway. The airing of same content ensures the viewer has no choice but to either suffer through the same programming or switch off the TV.

Inadvertently promoting fringe violent groups

The fringe groups like Sri Ram Sena led by Promod Muthalik and MNS get undue coverage in the media which in fact incites them to take to violence as a weapon which gives them a larger audience using the media as a platform. These anti-social elements should be condemned for the law breaking not eulogized by getting “exclusive interviews”.

Abdication of Neutrality

Another recent blot on the media emerged in the current general elections, where the sections of print media were accused of selling the interview space to candidates for bribes. Apart from this we also see incidents of biased reporting, look at any US media reports on the Copenhagen climate summit, they paint India and China as villains, while the Indian media sees it a moral victory for our side. We cannot see to get an objective view which is honest and the truth.

Conclusion

I don’t paint the entire media in black but the fact is, as a watch-dog which passes sweeping judgments on the other estates such as politicians, bureaucrats, police; it must introspect more closely. The Fourth Estate has actually become a fourth-rate enterprise seeking TRPs alone as measure of success.

Lessons from Iaccocca one of America's most respected business professional

After a long time, I decided to read Iaccoca’s autobiography again as several years ago when I was an aspirant to do my MBA, somebody told me this book was a good start. It did make some sense back then but it had even more sense now. Clearly reading the book the second time, you do realize the man has a very large ego and most of the book is written in first person, it takes pot shots at opponents and glosses over personal failures. Although it is an engaging book, it is not very objective and projects as Iaccoca as a superman. In my mind, the most objective business book written by a corporate manager must be ‘Who says Elephants cannot Dance?’ by Louis Gernster the CEO of IBM who oversaw the reinvention of the IBM business strategy in the late 90’s.

Who is Lee Iaccoca

Iaccoca was the son of an Italian migrant who went on to become the president at the Ford motor company, he was subsequently fired from his job at the age of 54 as a result of differences with the CEO and owner Henry Ford Jr. Instead of going home and enjoying retirement, he took over the reins of a financially struggling company Chrysler by taking a loan bailout from the US government and made it up and running again. This bailout package which has become so common in today’s economic scenario was extremely controversial in the early 80’s. One ironic fact, when Iaccoca testified before congress for a bailout, one of the staunch opponents was then chief executive of Lehman Brothers on the basis that a bailout was against the principles of free market economy. It is amazing indeed how times change so quickly.

Lessons for Professionals

Need for a good boss – It is very important to have a good boss to look up to. A good boss not only helps you to get the best of your professional capabilities and also helps the organization to be more profitable and sharper to handle competition.

Data is important but avoid analysis paralysis - Iaccoca is a believer in having good data and research work but it is not a great idea to wait endlessly for some small piece of data when you have more than 80% facts already.

Need for strong corporate governance - During his Ford days, Iaccoca talks about how the management regularly misused the company resources for personal use. The directors on the board often have collusions with the company executives which lead them to ignore excesses in financial planning. The problems faced by Chrysler highlights this fact. This point is pertinent as Iaccoca pointed this out in 1984 long before the Enron and Arthur Andersen scandals which shocked the world.

Lessons for Politicians and Economists

America is investing too much in paper money – Iaccoca in his closing remarks mentions that America is slowly moving away from a manufacturing and export driven nation to an import driven economy in many key sectors. An obsession with paper money was creating assets on paper instead on direct investment in the American economy. This point is well made as America has plunged into the subprime crisis and secondly the FIIs have been fuelling the economies of developing countries like India, China, and Brazil instead of strengthening the job market in the US. (Not that I am complaining about it, the IT industry boom has helped several professionals including myself to make a living and put India on the global map)

The debate about capitalism versus communism is dead- In the 80’s when Chrysler Corporation, the third largest American automobile company went to the government for a bailout package; it was severely criticized in the media and financial circles that it is a bad precedent. Now after the failure of the USSR in the later 80’s and the American economy meltdown in 2008 now question of taking extreme stands on capitalism versus communism is futile. You need free markets and competition but it has to be coupled with checks and balances in form of an industry regulator.

End Note

In the book it is mentioned, in 1980 when Chrysler was undergoing the financial crisis and was in line for a government bailout, the stand-up comedian Bill Cosby made a joke on the company's financial condition. "A guy was so mean... so mean that he called up Chrysler and asked them how is business?”

Two days back, Conan O Brien on the tonight show said“You know why Chrysler’s cars are the safest in the world, because most of them don’t leave the dealer’s store anyway”

The greatest lesson from history is that it repeats itself because men do not learn lessons from it.

Why Gene Roddenberry the creator of Star Trek deserves a Nobel Peace Prize.

The recent news of President Obama being awarded the Nobel Peace Prize was greeted with first with suprise and then derision. The best comment I saw on this topic which was the one which said by this award, two of the great brands the Nobel Prize and President Obama have both being devalued as both have taken a beating in terms of credibility.

Considering the Nobel Peace Prize committee is judging people on intent and vision rather than actual execution of the ideas, I just wondered why Gene Roddenberry who was an ex policeman who went on to produce a science fiction series in the 1960s which was cancelled after 3 seasons but became such a classic on re-runs and spawn so several sequels and dedicated fans across the world, cannot be considered for this honour.

Top reasons why Gene deserved a Nobel

Belief in the triumph of humanity

Unlike all science fiction like Martix, Terminator series which always show the bleak future belonging to the machines, Gene saw humanity being the master in the future, being united as one planet and taking to space exploration boldly.

Shunned Racism

During the 60s, Asians and Afro-Americans were never given leading roles, in fact they were discriminated against, Gene has the courage to cast an Afro-American actress and a Japenese actor in the main cast. The show also showed the first inter-racial kiss on American television media, surely a bold step where no man had gone before. His belief of a future free of bigotry and racias bias was surely admirable.

Such was the influence of the series when Nichelle Nichols the Afro-American actress wanted to withdraw from the series, Martin Luther King personally intervented and asked her to stay on the show as she was a role model for many black woman to emulate.

Having a Russian on the Show during middle of the Cold War

US and the USSR were locked in a bitter cold war and the arms and the space race was on full swing. In spite of this animosity which existed between the 2 nations, Gene introduced a new Russian character Chekov in season 2 after he was chided in a Russian newspaper that inspite of Russians being the first in space by launching the Spuntik, there were no Russians on the show. Even before the cold war ended, Gene saw an united effort from people of all nationalities coming together for common good.

Economy of the Future – No Money

Gene imagined in the future there would be no money, no poverty or disease. The basic needs of people would be taken care of and the primary goal of a person would not acquistion of wealth but at betterment of season. If you consider Maslow's hierarchy of needs, people would exist at the level of self actualization – wherein people work for betterment and achieving their personal talents and goals.

Logic versus Emotion

The character of Mr. Spock who is from an alien race who believes in pure logic was always in clash with the human characters in the ship, the best takeaway from this debate of logic and emotions served up interesting insights on how should humanity evolve, and finally the take on the show was that you need a bit of both a cool head and a warm heart.

Technology

The influence on science and technology is immense, Martin Cooper inventor of the mobile phone was inspired the communicators shown in the series. The show also showcased voice recognition and user friendly personal computers in the 1960's which it was beyond imagination of scientists and techies. In the honour of the influence Star Trek held on the American scientific community, the first space shuttle of NASA was named Enterprise after the fictional ship on which the adventures were based.

Gene Roddenberry might have actually changed the world much more in his own small way as compared to the current American President Obama. Gene might not have explored space in reality but he did convey a message of courage, peace and collaboration from all nationalities, gender and race which lives on after his death in 1991.

My Top Five Favourite Movie Moments

I was watching Munnabhai MBBS and saw one of my really favorite movie moments and was inspired to think about the really wonderful movie moments which have stayed with me over the recent years.

Number 5 – V for Vendetta

The protagonist V who is an freedom fighter/terrorist who breaks into the official news channel of a fascist British Government and ignites the minds of the masses who have been subdued by a dictator for several years now. It is not a well known movie so I am reproducing the dialogue for better context.

“Good evening, London. Allow me first to apologize for this interruption. I do, like many of you, appreciate the comforts of every day routine- the security of the familiar, the tranquility of repetition. I enjoy them as much as any bloke. But in the spirit of commemoration, thereby those important events of the past usually associated with someone's death or the end of some awful bloody struggle, a celebration of a nice holiday, I thought we could mark this November the 5th, a day that is sadly no longer remembered, by taking some time out of our daily lives to sit down and have a little chat. There are of course those who do not want us to speak. I suspect even now, orders are being shouted into telephones, and men with guns will soon be on their way. Why? Because while the truncheon may be used in lieu of conversation, words will always retain their power. Words offer the means to meaning, and for those who will listen, the enunciation of truth. And the truth is, there is something terribly wrong with this country, isn't there? Cruelty and injustice, intolerance and oppression. And where once you had the freedom to object, to think and speak as you saw fit, you now have censors and systems of surveillance coercing your conformity and soliciting your submission. How did this happen? Who's to blame? Well certainly there are those more responsible than others, and they will be held accountable, but again truth be told, if you're looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror. I know why you did it. I know you were afraid. Who wouldn't be? War, terror, disease. There were a myriad of problems which conspired to corrupt your reason and rob you of your common sense. Fear got the best of you, and in your panic you turned to the now high chancellor, Adam Sutler. He promised you order, he promised you peace, and all he demanded in return was your silent, obedient consent.”

It is a fantastic scene, especially in the post 9/11 scenario, or even if you consider closer home, the mindset of certain politicians offering security and strong governance who vilify the Muslim community and take a us versus them stance. Secondly creating a campaign of fear,death and destruction. It is remarkable even the tyrannical dictators in the Muslim countries and the Taliban project the western world as a threat and brainwash the people by propaganda,fear,and control through censorship. The strong message from this scene despite all pressures, we must never lose ground and hold our political class accountable to us instead of the other way around.

Number 4 – Munnabhai MBBS

The Parsi Dr. Rustam's old father who has lost the will to live and gives up eating is brought to the hospital and is administered saline drips. Munna bhai and Circuit play a game of carrom to revive the old man's spirits. The touching message from the moment is that at any stage of life, its the will to live and something to look forward too in life which keeps a man going. The legendary dialogue being ..”carrom khelanu, juice piyanu .. Mazzani life !!”

Number 3 – Kal Ho Na Ho

I know it could offend some purists that a Karan Johar flick comes in my top 5 list, but the scene when saif is going to propose to preity, she comes and tells him that she loves SRK and if she is mad enough to think if he will accept. Saif says “koi pagal hi hoga joh tumse pyaar nahi karega abhi jao” with such intensity, that really stayed with me for every guy who has ever had a crush on a good friend and he had to tell her the right thing, that she go for the other guy. Friendship winning over personal feelings is so bitter sweet !

Number 2 – The Dark Knight

Although critics and fans rave about the Joker's performance and his anchary the character for whom I really felt strongly about in the movie was Harvey Dent, a sane morally strong man who is reduced to a n psychotic killer who loses all his faith and belief in the world and system.

“You thought we could be decent men in an indecent time. But you were wrong. The world is cruel, and the only morality in a cruel world is chance. Unbiased. Unprejudiced. Fair.”

The solution which the batman could give the people was the need to have faith, and he takes the fall for the crimes committed by Harvey.

"Sometimes people don't need the truth, they deserve something better... they need to have their faiths rewarded."

The irony being Alfred his butler burning Rachel's letter telling Bruce Wayne that she loves Dent and wants to marry him and lets Bruce believe that one day Rachel would have come back to him underlying the fact even a superhero is vulnerable and needs faith more than truth was the fantastic climax to this brilliant movie. I wished this movie picked up more Oscars than it really did.

Number 1 – Lagaan

The villagers are upset with Bhuvan, that he pit them in this impossible match against the British and vow not to assist him in this foolhardy mission. Bhuvan and the young boy Tipu play the game in the centre of the village to attract the attention of the village folks. “Koi badi baat nahi Tipu,hum isle gilli danda kehte hai aur angrez isse crickut”.

He misses the ball twice, the entire village watches the 3rd ball, and the hopes, fear and tension of the villagers mount and Bhuvan sends the ball crashing to the temple bell and the mute guy Bhagga joins the team and slowly people's faith is won step by step. For me, that moment of gaining the faith of the people was a far more satisfying scene than the 1 hour plus cricket match climax.

So these were my favorite top 5 movie moments, the one which closely missed out the list was Forrest Gump, who goes back to save his friend Bubba in Vientam war zone. Bubba is fatally wounded, has a look at Forrest, smiles and says “I knew you would come back for me” and dies. The sheer beauty of true friendship and faith was conveyed so subtly by the director.

These were my favorite movie moments so tell me what was yours ?

The illusion of reality ….

Surf any channel you shall find reality shows for every possible genre song, dance,comedy,eating insects and worms,staying locked for 90 days, romance and even swayambar of Rakhi Sawant an item girl turned adarsh bahu. The latest to add to that list is the controversial Sach ka Saamna which even sent the Parliament in a tizzy.

When the saas bahu K serials ruled the roost, slient prayers by youth across the country yearned for something new and something refreshing. The channel owners hit upon the magic formula of Reality television,

There are people who are increasing finding the shows becoming more voyeuristic and making a bad impact on young children watching these shows. There is a group of member who believe in the freedom of expression and abhor any kind of censorship.

Song/dance Shows Indian Idol/ Sa re Ga ma

The first few shows were the simple harmless song and dance shows, people sing and you the audience can decide the faith of these contestants. Slowly this genre degenerated into asking for votes from the people of your region. Slowly the North East began to assert their presence in India by en mass voting. Then the hosts themselves would mention Bengal ke Debojit needs your votes, Punjab ke Sandeep needs your support etc. If that wasnt enough people started doing melodrama, crying fighting in order to create an impression, talent is not a prerequiste, it is the likeability of a contestant that matters.

So you have hearts of talents crushed and talentless singers getting their 2 minutes of fame and then fading away faster than they even ascended to the stars.

Roadies / Spiltsvilla/Big Boss

Nothing can be more infruitating that a show which says it potrays the youth of the nation, so you have a classic stereotype, a delhite fake english accent, lots of gaalis, tantrums and flirting on the show. You have a bald man, who thinks he is god's gift to humanity and the only thing he loves is run people down. Put people in situations, people fight and say hurtful things with a lot of beeps. Put the show at 7 pm prime time and repeat shows throughout the clock. The host/makers say that they respect women but the tasks and contestants reduce women to mere sex objects. These shows can impact the thought of entire tween generation, the pre teens who are trying to grow up too fast.

The myth called free will....

When there are any calls for regulation on these reality shows, the simple answer the show makers tell us is you can switch off the television. Easier said than done. The same shows run at different times, similar shows exist across different channels. Children cannot be supervised all the time, and temptation and curosity to explore some new stimulus often gets the better of common sense. The kids today are growing up too fast and infact the information fed to them isnt objective. The vices are packaged as style statements, being rude/crass is shown to be cool attitude. The loss of innocene in the future generation is what disturbs me a lot.

I am afraid that choice has already been made for the next generation by the consistent bombardment of voyereutic, consumeristic lifestyle choices. I know I may seem a tad old fashioned in this post but when I look back in the days of Doordarshan, I watched Fun Time an one hour cartoon serial slot from 12.00 to 1.00 in the afternoon during summer vacations and went teary eyed when the show wound up with the end of summer vacations. Now, we have maybe 10 dedicated cartoon channels but the kids today watch Roadies/big Boss or Spiltsvilla.

The truth is complex and rarely simple – Oscar Wilde I think battle between regulation and freedom of expression is far from over !!

Pointless things people say Part II – Shaadi ke Side Effects !!

The age of 26-27 is a very interesting period of life and a very challenging one. Your peer group begins to get married suddenly and suddenly the world becomes divided into the haves and have-nots. It does not matter which group you are in, you experience a weird feeling and are awkward how to talk about the topic regarding impeding marriage. The following are the few gems which you shall hear in conversations. What they say and What they mean.

You two make a great couple / You two look cute together


Even if the guy looks like a rhinoceros and the girl looks like giraffe who could be mistaken for a ladder, you have to say this statement because it is politically correct thing to say. Alternatively It is also a nice way of saying, teri aaukat ke liye this person is more than enough.


Who is the lucky girl ?


This is a line said with least conscience, especially when you know the guy is a drunkard, constant womanizer or he is very orthodox / boring. There is no way in life, you would want your sister or friends to marry this chap, still do you really think the girl is lucky. Shame on all of you who use this line without remorse.


Beta shaadi ke baad you are so dead !!


It is extremely ironical, it is always the single unmarried man who seems to know that marriage is a deathtrap. It has been passed on from generations of unmarried men to make fun of the guy who is going to get married. I mean what empirical proof exists that states that married folks are more unhappy than whining pining single clan ?


I have found the one....

I was given this unsolicited but extremely relevant advice by a thrice married and thrice divorced person that “ Get married early in life, then you get to choose, in case you wait too late you get chosen”.

Arranged or love marriages become a stressful experience after a period of time , if you have seen more and more people without success. At first you are idealistic, you have a role model about your ideal person. With more rejections on the way, then you think there is something wrong with you , so you are ready to compromise with your dream man/woman a little.

Eventually the little compromise ended up with you are just glad that he/she is human, off the opposite gender and for some wierd reason doesnt seem to dislike you unlike the rest of her/his gender.

The sentence should actually read as I have the found the one … ( perhaps the last one on earth so Hurry offer valid untill stocks last !! )


It happened so fast … I didn't time to tell anyone


I had all the time, I didnt have time to tell you even my my 3rd cousin from Alaska knew before you. I seriously hope you didn't fall for that one. The fact is I did not want to share it with you, at least now get a hint of your standing in my social circle you loser !!


Disclaimer – The comments are exaggerated liberally so don't take offense to them
Yeah right, I have said what I wanted to really say but now,with this disclaimer, I can shirk the responsibilities for my statements ;)

The Order in Chaos … that is India !!

I must admit, I have been a bit out of touch from posting on my blog due to certain other commitments in life, feeling a bit rusty so forgive the lazy writing to follow.

India the world's largest democracy, one the world's oldest civilization and second largest populous nation with a huge youth population does look forward to a very great and vibrant future. But many historians, economists and many citizens see it as a chronic under-performer and condemn it as though it is close to a failed state. Let us look at a few common criticisms India has faced in the past 60 odd years of independence.

Extended Socialism Tryst and Anti Business Attitude

To be honest, India had the scars of being victim of imperialism and being taken over by a very large corporation , remember The East India Company, all our leaders were in jail and faced oppression from the British Raj, so there was strong urge to break free from all Western. It was more a misdirected anger towards all things Western and capitalists who exploited India as a colony.

So I would say India behaved like an angry emotional adolescent who did not want to talked down anymore and wants to break from the past completely. A case of throwing the baby out with the water.

The Pro Russia Stance and Non Allied Movement setbacks

It is a fact, India still does not enjoy the best of relations of US in spite of being a democracy, the US with its regional interests still views Pakistan as a key ally and does not want to provoke China. In the 70's during Bangladesh war, the Americans were pro Pakistanis.

India was like Karan from Mahabharata, when faced isolation in the South Asia with the twin threats of Pakistan and China with US taking the opposite side, India chose to side with the Russians. India which had strong socialist leanings naturally sided with the Russians who eventually went on to lose the Cold War.

Caste based Reservations and politics

The only issue which is very close to my heart, that merit does not get its due in this nation due to a large proportion of reservations in college/government. In this case, I have two points of views to be objective, the scheduled castes and tribes did suffer extreme atrocities in the past. They needed some economic benefits to find their feet. The Congress party which had the mandate from the people from 1947 to 1977 – 30 years could not give a coherent solution to the masses. The 1975 Emergency was the last straw for the people of India and Congress party lost its first Lok Sabha elections. In 1978, the Mandal Commission was set up by the Janta Party Govt. which paved the way for wide spread reservations and the rise of the caste based parties.

My conclusion, I agree Caste based politics is detrimental to the nation, but it was the mistake of founding fathers of Independent India that they could not address this issue in the first 3 decades and finally it became an emotive issue for exploitation. The funny part is there are poor people in the villages who face the Maoists and rich people driving in cars who have a OBC certificate who keep get the benefits of the reservation schemes. It is flawed but even nations like the US have suffered from apartheid, India is not unique in its problems.

Conclusion

India has its flaws, but the fact is India is a vibrant economy which gives people the right choose its government, you have a free press which reports events as it happens, not like our neighbouring China which is ruled with an iron glove with extreme censorship, The crack down on Tiebetans and now against the Muslim Uyghurs is one such example. The world is silent about these events but I am happier India has made slower progress than China, at least we have an open free society. India is finally on the way to realize its dreams with an economy which is robust and has great potential. Indian entrepreneurs, Tatas, Ambanis, Mittals ( Sunil and Laxmi), Premji and Murthy taking India to center stage.

I would like to end with two points, US got its independence in 1776 and is 233 year old democracy and the UK gave women the right to vote only in the year 1928 after long and bitter struggle for equal rights. India despite a large illiterate population and a large diversity in religion, language barriers and regional aspirations has remarkably succeeded as a democracy.

There have been blemishes on occasions but I think for a 62 year nation it has done pretty well considering the constraints and the environment. Let us consider the first 50 years like birth pangs and adolescence phase during which our nation learned the ropes. The new India is mature and raring to go. India was founded on a noble ideas freedom, social justice and religious tolerance.

Nothing can stop an idea whose time has come !! That Idea is India. There is a method to this madness and an inherent order in this chaos.

From Angels to Demons …

Today MS Dhoni finally joins a very elite and prestigious club which has been graced by the former greats of the Indian cricket including Sachin Tendulkar, Saurav Ganguly, Rahul Dravid, Azhar, M K Pataudi and I guess almost all Indian Cricket Captains must be in that league. India's Most Hated . An extremely natural reaction of the Indian cricket fan who worships his/her cricketing heros and makes them demigods only to tear them down after their dreams are shattered.

Truly being an cricketing idol in the Indian Subcontinent has always been a double edged sword, no one better than Wasim Akram knows this who had stones pelted at his house, and the Pakistanis had to change the city where they were supposed to land at in order to avoid angry mobs. Remember 1996 World Cup, where the crowds became unruly and the defining image of a crying Vinod Kambli leaving the stadium showed the ugly side of Indian cricket fan.

Dhoni Today 09

So Dhoni went from the being Ranchi's poster boy to having his effigy burnt in his own hometown. Life does come a complete circle. The Captain Cool is now a boy scout and a petty squabbler with Virendra Sehwag and off course the Indian media. His every decision has been analyzed and postmortems conducted which labels him as an incompetent leader.

Dhoni Yesterday 07

A flash back, Its the 2007 T20 World Cup Final the dream match India vs Pakistan, Dhoni gave the ball to Joginder Sharma much to the horror of the Indian fans, and Misba hu Haq who till then had played a splendid innings played an extremely unnecessary reverse sweep which was held by Sreesanth to give India its second moment of World Cup glory and a hero in Indian Cricket was born. The boy from Ranchi, Jharkhand, and it heralded the birth of the new Indian Icon who would eclipse all the existing Indian stars.

What if ?

But just imagine instead Misba spanking it down the ground for a boundary, Dhoni's legend would have died a premature death and Joginder Sharma would have become a national villain like poor Ravinder Jadeja today.

Lessons

There lies the fine line between victory and defeat, glory and failure, fame and obscurity. That is indeed the beauty of sport, its unpredictability and the thrill it brings. Success and failure in life are always separated usually by a small margin but the repercussions always been more drastic. But there is a good news in this, life gives you a second chance, third and a fourth chance in fact, if you are ready to learn your lesson. The problem is we feel so gutted that we ignore the second chances to get back on track and some times meander in mediocrity without discovering our true potential.

Do we not back our friends, children or a close one when they fail, is that not our ideal role. So it is our time to be mature and stand by our team. Sure mistakes were done and the corrective steps must be taken but our heros do not deserve this kind of lynching. We must be more patient, less eager to put some one on a pedestal and later avoid baying for blood at the first sign of failure.

So where does MS Dhoni go from here, well after an introspection, he will reflect on 07 and 09 World Cup campaigns and he will probably realize that This too shall pass ...

I guess the Indian fans should realize this as well :)

Being a second class citizen in a first world country !

Oscar Wilde aptly put it “Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious”, although one can be proud of one's nation but the strong sense of identity should not extend so much that one hates other nationals. It is fairly ridiculous for me to believe just because I am born in a particular country, that nation becomes the greatest nation in the world and the rest are somehow inferior. The focus on racism has emerged in view of the recent attacks on Indians in Australia and some murders of Andhra students in the US couple of years back.

This kind of identity based ideology has always lead to ugly civil wars and genocides, may it be against the Jews, the Lankan Tamils conflict and the racism discrimination in South Africa of Blacks and Asians including Indians. Although these were really horrendous crimes against humanity, the current crisis in Australia is more a result of fear and mistrust rather than a deep seated racial bias.

I would like to raise a question if it is really racism or other factors at play. I believe it is more a case of xenophobia – a dislike/fear of some one different from oneself which is a subtle difference owning to one cultural differences and secondly the increasing economic recession which makes them hostile towards India, arguably the largest back office of the world.

It is indeed surprising in a first world country in the 21st century, where education levels are so high and countries which have better human rights records, why do such citizens of this civilized society demonstrate such base violent emotions. For a moment here I would like to play Devil's advocate, to understand why would people from the first world countries hate Indians.


Racial profiling post Sept 11 - Let us face it, post Sept 11 any Asian person in a public place who acts a little weird sends shivers down the spines of our Caucasian friends. The fear leads to anger and anger leads to hate which finally takes more violent proportions


Cultural Differences – Indians hang out in groups, dont really want to mingle in a bar and speak their own native language that is a criticism often laid on students here. I guess it must also be a result of discomfort they feel in a new country they kind of bond with their own to get adjusted intially. But my friends in the States, seem to have only desi friends not even good foreign acquaintances. ( I may be wrong here, people can correct me) This could be a factor why the two cultures do not assimilate comfortably.
But then Indians have always bad at inclusiveness, a group of Tamilians or Bengalis can isolate Indians from other part of the same country, where does an Australian or American have a chance to mingle in :)


Where does you loyalty lie Mate ? - It is ironic, when you watch a India- England match at Lords, all our NRIs come in smart blue Sahara India cricket shirts and cheer India beat England in their own country, they celebrate Rajini kant movies and the Pakistanis scream Pakistan zindabad in a must win match for England in the T-20 World Cup match. I am sure this kind of disloyalty is not going to win hearts in the home country.


Its about the money honey – No one really cares if immigrants live here, only when the sinking feeling beings to start that, we are getting marginalized in our own backyard leads to instant hatred towards the outsiders, The fact that the Australian GDP growth has dropped to 0.3% and people cheering Obama on when he imposes work permit restrictions while advocating free market economy for all other goods ( talk about double standards, perhaps better left for another blogpost )


These are perhaps a few reasons, why Indians aboard are hated, although any form of violence cannot be justified and it is condemnable in all forms. However, There is introspection needed on both sides to see how in this era of globalization, this sort of nation based identity can be diluted and we see each other as just as human beings. The world economy has moved irrecoverably wherein the boundaries between nations have been breached, so people need to break those boundaries in their hearts as well.

Although I do feel sympathy for Indians abroad, I do also believe we need to get our act together at home as well, wherein students from Bihar UP are beaten in Mumbai for wanting to appear in Railway Examinations, a shame considering we being villians at home and calling foul abroad. Kind of ironic isnt it ?

Take a Bow the Aam Aadmi !

At the outset of this post, I shall state that I have been a supporter of the ruling party partially due to the fact that my family have been traditional supporters of the Gandhi family but over the years I have found my own reasons to support the UPA. But this post is my attempt to objectively analyze the results and lessons for the various parties.

The Left

The biggest losers in this elections has to be the Left Front considering both the bastions of Kerala and West Bengal falling to the Congress. The loss in Kerala was on the cards considering the infighting and corruption charges, but West Bengal was the big surprise. The consistent high pitch attack on Manmohan Singh on the nuclear deal and the threat of not supporting Cong in the post poll scenario cost them big time.

The reasons which cost the Left the elections complacency in taking Mamta Banerjee and Cong lightly, secondly demonstrating rigidity in policy issues e.g. the nuclear deal and other economic reforms. Prakash Karat and company need to evaluate their political relevance and adjustments to their rather rigid political outlook.

Lalu, Jaya, Maya, Paswan, Pawar, Mulayam and all alleged king makers

The glorious dream for the regional parties that a hung parliament was smashed. The members of the third and the fourth front wanted to capitalize on instability and derive maximum power for self. None of these parties had a plan for the nation in terms of strategy or a clarity in addressing the key issues in the area of economy, foreign affairs or handling terrorism.

The nation has rejected these brand of politics, although regional parties retain relevance in the state politics as in Nitesh having a strong presence in Bihar and Naveen Patnaik in Orissa. The regional parties will keep the national parties in check.

BJP

The BJP made several tactical blunders, in an electorate which no long identifies with religion as a factor for determining self worth, condoning Varun Gandhi's hate speech was a big mistake. The second blunder L.K Advani targeting Manmohan Singh who has a clean image and consistently labeling him as a weak PM, ( it is tough to justify that when the PM risked his government and had a face off with the Left for the nuclear deal, a PM who removed the Home Minister post 26/11 ) and thirdly projecting Narendra Modi as the next PM candidate which was political harakiri. He may be the undisputed leader in Gujarat but his actions in the post Godhra riots, his venomous tongue in talking about his political opponents was not appreciated in most circles.

BJP is in great disarray with no fresh agenda to offer to the Indian people, no charismatic leader who can lead the BJP and NDA coalition to present a credible alternative to the Cong led UPA in the coming years. If they fall back on Narendra Modi as the next leader they will only alienate potential allies and the electorate in general.

Congress

The Cong should not fall in the trap of sycophancy of trying to elevate Rahul Gandhi to the top seat yet. The role Manmohan Singh played in builidng the credibility of the UPA is as significant to the victory as Sonia Gandhi's charisma. The Gandhi family taking a back seat, to let Manmohan Singh take the top job showed the maturity with which Congress is having a long term view to restore the party to its former glory. If the party wants to really shut out the competition for the future, they should give youth a chance, put in qualified ministers in place and ensure the connect with the electorate is in place.

Indian Voter

The rural voter is generally derided for being influenced by money/alcohol, or the urban voter is accused of not even exercising his/her franchise. The voter has sent a clear signal that he/she does not believe in hate politics or put his trust on small regional parties. A key note to reflect upon UPA has a mandate which is 10 seats below the majority mark, which is a warning to them that do not be too complacent, the Indian voter is watching you ….

Take a bow aam aadmi you showed the netas who is the boss !!

The Enemy Within

The Warriors of Amesopotia

The warriors of Amesopotia were the most feared in the medieval world, they were known far and wide for their valor and the can do attitude. They had won several wars for their king and were willing to lay down their lives for the empire. The conquests made the king avaricious and he ensured more and more of the young lads in the kingdom were recruited to become warriors. Since the plunder ensured there was enough gold in the treasury, to train and pay salaries for these fine warriors.

One winter, he led the army to an improbable mission to defeat the kingdom of Nardua which was considered a tough nation to beat in ordinary circumstances itself, the winter could have posed a greater risk which was ignored by the advisors and generals. There were optimistic scenarios plotted, songs of glory were sung and a wild frenzy which ensured blinded all people of any rational reasoning.

So the army marched in, the biggest enemies was the environment itself, with food reserves running out , the king doubted if the army could make it to the end of the winter. Some bumbling accountants calculated mere 40% of the standing army could defeat the Narduan forces. The king ordered the execution of the remaining Amespotian warriors for the greater good of the kingdom. The rest waited for the winter to end. The king was expecting the war to end soon. It did but not in his favour. He was routed, his warriors scattered, defeated and most of them retreated.

War is not an arithmetic, people have memories, they carry scars for life. In time of optitism, generals end up raising large armies without looking at the costs involved. In a time of glory, the advisors ignore obvious signs of decay and ruin, and make outrageous plans. Unfortunately when things go wrong, the heads roll not at the top but of the foot soldiers. The decisions which the few make impact a vast majority and when the time comes for the army to perform, it is morale of the soldier on the ground which matters !

Does the above story ring a bell in today's world. Whatever be the odds and the adversity at hand, it is enemy within who undermines the organization.

In this recession hit era, most companies are under the impression that cost cutting and layoffs are the only choices to solve problems, although I agree that it is difficult to come to a quicker solution but there are better strategies in the areas of recruitment, utilization of employees and targeting new markets/segments to overcome economic difficulties. But blind cost cutting is not the answer although it is a very tempting tool which shows immediate results. The test of a organization is not how it treats its employees in the good times but it handles the work force in tougher times.  The recession will end one day, and so will the credit crunch, but the hit on the employee pysche cannot be restored magically over night. 

When the only tool you have is a hammer, then you tend to see every problem as a nail – Abraham Maslow

Love, Friends and Sitcoms

One interesting thing to notice regarding the themes running common in the most popular sitcoms in the era :- F.R.I.E.N.D.S , How I met your Mother and Coupling ( BBC Brit Comedy I am addicted to these days) is love and friendship. Why are these two themes so universal, I guess the reason is that these are two relationships which a person chooses for himself and it is not imposed by him by nature or society. 

It is also bit ironic, that the relations in which we have the greatest freedom to choose, makes us the most vulnerable. These are the relationships which give us the greatest joy and despair. Guess, that is the price we have to pay for the freedom.

The inspiration for this post is me watching back to back episodes of How I met your Mother season II for past 2 weekends which I finished shortly before starting this post. So the main characters in this serial really represent the various views people hold regarding a relationship. 

Ted – Who believes in true love and the concept of finding the one and yes bit unlucky in love

Robin – an independent woman who finds commitment and marriage unacceptable

Lily and Marshall – The college sweethearts who have been eternally together and symbol of true love for all other friends in the group. I guess we all have such a couple in our friend circles although you do admire them but there is always a tinge of envy if we too could find some one special like that.

Barney - A chronic bachelor who loves the single life who seems shallow and callous on the surface but does have a warm side as good friend who however is cynical towards the some one special concept.

The season 2 beings with Lily and Marshall broken up and Ted and Robin getting together. The journey sees ups and downs for both couples with Lily and Marshall getting married whilst Ted and Robin breaking up for good at the end of season.

One more interesting dimension of this serial, it is set in the future Ted telling his children how he met their mother. It is known to the viewers that Robin is not the some one special but Ted does not know that yet and he believes in the magic of this current relationship and goes through it with smiles and tears on the way. 

The beauty of the serial lies in the fact the true identity of the mother is never revealed but it always ends with the promise of a better tomorrow for Ted.

Life often does not follow plans perfectly but it often turns out more perfect than planned. Keep the faith ! 

A sloppy Job(s) when the enemy was at the Gates

This post is the result of me watching the movie Pirates of the Silicon Valley – a not so well known made for TV movie which tracks the rise and fall of Steve Jobs and the rise and rise of Bill Gates with the backdrop of how the computer industry was revolutionized by the duo.

Before I go into more details of this topic, I would like to digress a bit regarding why this genre of two powerful men battling it out excites me. One of my favourite books is the Fourth Estate by Jeffery Archer which is the battle between two competing media barons. The struggle between Karunanidhi and MGR was also nicely captured in Mani Ratnam's Iruvar for the chief minstership in Tamil Nadu. In a way, even the Mahabharata boiled down to a battle of wits between Lord Krishna and Duryodhana's tactics. The seemingly two protagonists ( The grey shades in both the characters makes it difficult to pick an antagonist in cases) who keep pushing their way forward initially unaware of each other's existence hurling towards their shared destiny. The intriguing part when they come face to face and the chess game which is played out later makes for interesting reading/viewing in most cases.

Initial Days - Gates and Jobs

Gates and Jobs dropped out of college in order to pursue their entrepreneurial dreams. Gates from Harvard and Jobs from Reeds College. Gates had a friend Paul Allen who had a steady job in Honeywell and completed education. Jobs had Steve Wozniak as friend working for HP. The friendship forged early on took them ahead on the road of entrepreneurship.

Jobs had audited a course in calligraphy and design which he claims later was the inspiration for fonts in graphical user interface, Gates had taken a infamous maths 55 class which he struggled through which made him realize there are far more intelligent people than him in this world. These two being really significant lessons which history would later come to tell.

Sleeping Giants who let the upstarts in – HP,IBM and Xerox

One of the interesting sub plots in the rapid ascent of the duo was the lack of interest shown by the leading industry players towards the personal computer market. As Wozniak was working for HP initially, the company had the first rights to apply for patents to his work but decided against it as they did not see the reason why ordinary folks would need a personal computer.

Similarly when Bill Gates did not sell the DOS operating system but chose to license it to IBM. IBM did not realize the implications of the power Microsoft would gain in the future over the hardware players including IBM.

The pioneer inventor of modern GUI and the mouse, Xerox research scientists could not convince their top management for a chance to commercialize the products, instead the management allowed access to Steve Jobs and his team to understand the system in exchange for shares of Apple Computers.

These costly mistakes which the big corporations let these two entrepreneurs to dig in deeper and create their personal empires.

Management Styles

Jobs was more an arrogant idealist who believed he was an artist and his products needed to change the world around. In contrast, Bill Gates realized the need to be indispensable and to create a need and do a vendor lock in, so that the customer cannot opt out.

Jobs ran his company in a fanatical fashion which tore the company into two, the team working on Macintosh as the chosen ones and rest as nobodies which led to great discomfort. This finally led to Steve Wozniak to quit Apple and own eventual ouster from Apple 3 months after his 30^th birthday by John Sculley whom Jobs had bought in from Pepsi Cola.

In contrast, Gates knew how to keep his friends close and enemies even closer. He was always aided by Paul Allen who actually managed to buy the DOS operating system from Seattle Computer Company for a mere $50,000 which shaped Microsoft's destiny and off course current chief executive Steve Ballamer who have always stood by Gates.

Why Jobs lost out to Gates

• Jobs was too arrogant and did not see that his arrogance alienated him from those closest to him

• Market realities are more important than mere idealism, which Gates realized much more quickly

• The enemy is seldom the big Goliath but lurking close by, ironically the way Apple blindsided IBM, HP in the first race, in the second contest Microsoft got the better of Apple.

• The lesson of humility that there are more people smarter than him, let Gates be more careful and calculative

  
  

Epilogue

Bill Gates is still of the most richest men in the world but Microsoft is struggling with Google in the battle for services in the Internet space. Steve Jobs has made a come back of sorts with the Ipod / Iphone revolution, so I guess there are no permanent losers and winners in business or life.

An apt quote which was used in the movie Pirates of the Silicon Valley to end the piece.

"Good artists copy. Great artists steal" by Picasso.

Jobs was a good artist however love him or hate him Gates was the great artist in the operating systems wars.

Random Images ....

For a while now, I have been thinking for a theme to blog on but some how, nothing seems that pertinent to write on elections, hate speeches or monster dads. So just decided to pen my thoughts on some random images which have stayed with me for the past week or so.

A perky 4 year old kid in a train

I saw the kid in the train accompanied by his parents and he was one cocky, loud kid screaming his lungs out at 6.00 am in the morning and at that time did not seem cute at all to me or the co-passengers. But there were two stand out moments in the journey though

• At one point of time, the train was going really slow, he said mom i will get down and push the train to move faster, his mother giggled at this show of strength the kid obviously hurt said he is really strong and pick up the train too with all seriousness
  
• Second really funny moment was when the kid was given a drawing book to color and he was to color Mickey Mouse, the kid ended up coloring the entire page black and saying mom see how fast I can color with proud approving glances from mommy dearest !

What can I say, the innocence and the perkiness of the kid and love of the supportive mother made this image stick on my mind.

A photo of a newly wed bride

Thanks to the update features of social networking sites, the most often thing you see are newly updated photos, and I saw one such photograph which captured a very serene and peaceful look of a newly wedded bride. I mean there was love and happiness in the eyes too, but the strong sense of completeness which has come about by the union was very apparent.

The reason the image stuck in my head is probably I often see people happy and over excited which often is short lived and leads to strife soon but then we do find the one eventually after a few bumps on the way and we know it is the bond of a lifetime the moment is rather special.

Old Age a Reality Check

I met a relative of mine close to 7-8 years later and found him a completely changed person, teeth gone, sagging shoulders and mentally very tired. As a kid, I remember him as a very sharp, intelligent and well dressed person but time has taken severe toll due to illness and other problems.

This image did shake me up a bit, I cannot generalize but I always behave like I am going to live for ever and I take a few things for granted youth, intellect and health perhaps I did exist in a bubble of illusion. The bubble has finally burst and I do have food for thought.

Summary

If I have to just put a common theme around these three images, in childhood we are rambunctious and so full of life, we do not know what lies in store in the future. In our youth we face our victories and defeats which shape our lives. Finally time catches up with us and we fade away inevitably.

Quoting from a movie I saw long back, which had these closing lines which are apt here

"Someone once told me that time was a predator that stalked us all our lives, but I rather believe that time is a companion who goes with us on the journey and reminds us to cherish every moment because they'll never come again. What we leave behind is not as important as how we've lived"

The choice is up to us if we want to fear time as an enemy or enjoy the moments as they come.

The importance of being Assertive ...

The inspiration for this article was a soft skills training I attended recently. Most folks attend such trainings because they are on bench or like the pretty instructor or similar such nefarious intentions, but this session on assertiveness did force me to think a lot about it for several days.

In today's world people seem to operate at extremes only. If we see the actions of the Taliban or extremists attacking the civil world or the US trying to bomb Afghanistan and Iraq into submission. In India itself, the self appointed 'moral' police who are uncultured brutes who resort to aggressive tactics to suppress the rights of women. The usual common man in India backs down to such pressure and does not bother to vote and takes the passive way out to deal with the world. What both sides are missing is the virtue of assertiveness

Let us take a simpler closer to home example, how many of us have been mollycoddled into doing something we did not want to do by our loved ones, to act against our will. Haven't we all not succumbed to pressure not wanting to hurt others and ended up hurting ourself at some point of time?

Assertiveness as per definition is standing up for your rights without infringing on the rights of others. In a way, referring to the epics Lord Krishna asking Arjuna to take on his cousins in the battle of Kurushetra to even history Mahatma Gandhi leading the non violent freedom moment shows us the importance of being assertive in our lives.

Rights of an assertive individual

• The right to voice his opinions without fear
  
• The right to make mistakes ( without malice or as Hriday points out freedom to make mistakes and not a right persay )
  
• The right to be accept one's ignorance
  
• The right not to be emotional manipulated
  
• The right to change your mind
  
• To right to make unconventional decisions
  

As they say, with power comes responsibilites, we cannot be just self centred in pursuit of own rights so there are some duties as well.

Duties of an assertive individual

• To listen to other person's point of earnestly
  
• To work for a workable compromise
  
• To stand by your views in adverse conditions

Before, we start practicing assertiveness, what we need as individuals is the clarity of purpose, an open mind to entertain opposing views and the ability to engage in dialogue without being highhanded. With these thoughts in mind, I think the world will be much better to place to live in if we can find the voice to speak our minds and offcourse listen to others.

Pointless Things People Say !

Considering the 'busy' lives we yuppies (young urban professionals) allegedly live with only weekends to unwind and recoup. The weekends are the only thing to look forward to in lives. But people are always wanting that piece of our time. The ever increasing modes of communication like emails, social networking sites, mobile phones and instant messengers like gtalk/yahoo has made avoiding these people even tougher!

In order to avoid such people, a new set of pointless statements have been manufactured in order to make this more platable. These have now become part of daily conversations when we really do not want to keep in touch with people but also want to seem so politically correct about it.

Top pointless lines people say and what they mean :-

We should meet up/catch up sometime !

More like next lifetime or something, I hope I never bump into you any time soon.

I am bit busy at work, can we talk in the evening ....

Never mind, I am sitting right now in the canteen with similar jobless colleagues having coffee but I really do not want to talk to you.

I will call you on the weekend pucca

yeah Right, you could die waiting by the phone ….. get a life loser !!

Dil se he/she is not bad !

When you have nothing nice to say about a person … you end up saying this !

We stay in the same city and haven't met up it is really bad !

We stay in the same city and WOW am I glad the city is so big, I can avoid people like you :)

How is life ? Bas chal raha hai tu bata

Ultimate filler statement... I do not want to tell me how my life is !! but I do not mind if u spill the beans about your life...

I am so busy re, I just don't have time for anything these days...

I am not THAT busy, it is just that I do not have ANY TIME for you these days !!

This post has been written partly in jest and is highly exaggerated but the truth lies somewhere in between.

There is a Dev D in all of us somewhere ….

Needless to say, my last weekend's watch was Dev D and it was not a waste of my money or time. Although I would not call it a classic by any stretch of imagination but definitely it is a creative fare with wonderful music and contemporary story telling avoiding cliches in the narrative. The most refreshing aspects was the characterization, the choices reflect free will, in cases people may seem flawed but still no one seeks refuge behind the excuse of fate or family pressure.

The character of Dev D does not create any sympathy for himself and rightly so. He is a selfish, pathetic arrogant soul who gets his just desserts. Paro is fiesty and quickly moves on her life without brooding too long. Anyways I do not want in more detail about the movie as it already has great reviews and I do not want to add to that list.

Coming to the question, why is Dev D the ninth adaption of the old novel about a coward who did not have the guts to fight for his love and dies a broke alcoholic so appealing to the film makers and film goers as well.

Possible reasons why Dev D is so popular

• He is extremely arrogant and realizes his only folly in hindsight

• He cribs a lot and wallows in self pity

• He is neurotic and guilt trips Paro, his family by his chronic lethargy and self destructive habits

• He gets to booze first thing in the morning ( yeah many people would like that :P am sure )

• He derives pleasure in his own self inflicted pain and assumes he is doing a great sacrifice

In all the reasons, mentioned below many of us have experinced a similar emotion. It may not necessarily a lost love (GF/BF variety), It could be missing out on a dream job, vacation or promotion. Although conventional wisdom suggests we should dust ourselves and keep moving on, there is a morbid pleasure in cribbing and lying on the floor and drawing self sympathy and attention of others.

The overdosing need not be just be on alcohol, it can be over focusing on the job, excessive shopping or even calling up friends/family and restating the same old story on how tragic your life is. In this sorrow you find the purpose of your life, that you are alone in the world and you alone have faced such a calamity. In some way the world, God is against you and you are being victimized. This feeling makes you feel important and wanted some how. Any kind of advice sane or otherwise is just brushed off and you continue on the same vein. In a way, it is a classic attention seeking behaviour to pander to personal ego.

That is the precise reason, why Dev D is so integral to all of us, he reminds to us how as humans we all are fallible and can be petty enough to be self destructive. Dev D is about been stupid,egoistic and on top of it being proud about it.

As the movie Dev D ended on a surprising happy note, let us also find our own redemption and the inner strength to fight the Dev D in us from entirely taking over our life. Life is tough, it does not become any better with a lousy attitude.

“All of us are lying in a gutter, Only few of us are looking at the stars” - Oscar Wilde

The Dynamics of Relationships

As my peer group is hitting the quarter life crisis mark, lots of them including me are increasingly asking similar questions, how do we manage our relationships. By relationships I mean not only having a girl friend/boy friend, it also relates to keeping in touch with past friends and importantly how to make new friends or meet potential life partners.

Couple of interesting pieces written by my friends whose blogs I do follow regularly, actually made me think on these lines in more details. The problems include is being taken for granted by supposedly good friends to travails in finding your true soul-mate . 

Why the Crisis in the first place

The job disperses the friendly group into different geographies which brings challenges of adjustment. Some adjust fast and some get bogged down more. The ones who cannot adjust become naturally self centred in order to make the adjustments, which is considered selfish by other friends. As time progresses, pay packages, the race to buy the new car, the comparisons begin to take toll on friendships.  Ego and the inability to communicate your true feelings is the problem in most cases. 

The Tough Question

There is one additional caveat, sometimes we outgrow a certain relationships and it is time to let go and there are relationships which can be rekindled with some interventions, the challenge is knowing which one needs to be pursued ?

Evaluating this questions becomes really tough, it requires us to be objective ( tough call for a irrational social animal called man/woman), keep aside our ego, delusions and the tendency to wanting to cling on and decide if the relation is giving us positive energy and is meaningful or it is actually deceptive, draining our energy and eroding our self worth.

Rather than going more detail and being prescriptive, I would just say in the words of Shakespeare To thy own self be true, reflect over your relationships, take stock of friends, acquaintances and enemies. Decide who needs to stay, who needs to go and what are your priorities in life. At first It may seem tough, scary but then you need bite the bullet and make the seemingly tough decisions.

The Three Ring Theory

Reference is due to Khalil who came come up with theory in the first place long back in my engineering days . In order to have sustainable good relationships, we need three rings or three kind of friend circles.

First Ring

The inner circle of closest friends whom who can confide everything and also fewer in number. The most mature and oldest friends.

Second Ring

The good friends and the hangout buddies which comprises of a bigger circle with whom we do share our interests and are in touch with regularly.

Third Ring

The social acquaintances like office colleagues, classmates the folks with whom we enjoy the occasional banter and have a potential to move up into the inner circles. I believe this circle is important as today's strangers become tomorrow's good friends.

In summary, I believe it is important to maintain a wide circle of friends so that we give space to our close friends and give chances to get to know new people so that the cycle of making new friends does not have to die after we hit the corporate world.

Slumdog Millionnaire – an ode to Bollywood and Western Cliches

Finally I succumbed to the intense hype around the Slumdog Millionaire and especially regarding the music of A.R Rahman winning the Global Globe. Before I go into details about what I thought about the movie, I will say one thing, the movie was engaging even if I do not consider as the most classic movie of the year.

The plot is about a 18 year old slum kid who works as chai wala in a call centre knows all the answers to questions in KBC because each answer lies in his past experiences in life.

Reasons why the movie worked for me

• A. R Rahman demonstrates a wonderful range in his score, an amalgamation from pure western tracks, gangster rap to Ringa Ringa – an unabashed tribute to Lakshmikant Pyaarlal's Choli ke Peeche.

• The kids who play the role of slum kids in the beginning of the movie are simply adorable and make it seem so real

• Anil Kapoor although with a limited role as the game show host who cannot accept the chaiwallah making a fortune, the insecurities, fake friendliness and underlying prejudice was very convincing.

Reasons why the movie did not work for me

• It puts in all the cliches the western world perceives India is all about- the slums, rioting, tourists getting ripped off, the Taj Mahal and off course their latest pet peeve Indian call centres

• The story is too sugary with all villains miraculously getting punished and the guy gets the girl against all odds and he doesn't even care about the millions he makes in the process. If it was a true blue Hindi movie, people would have taken much more pot shots about it.

• Dev Patel who plays the 'slumdog' seems way too sophisticated and his British accent doesn't add credibility to his performance at all.

• The character of Salim the elder brother is very quirky and uneven he plays the role by being Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde to bring twists to this movie and deliver the final happy ending.

In summary, it is a good old Hindi Potboiler which would make any Bollywood director proud while pandering to the stereotypes which the West thinks about India. It does make a valid point about how the slum kids in India actually face life in passing. The entire thin plot is summarized which also explains why this movie has become such a phenomenon probably it was destined to succeed.

Because It was written ….

P.S : I would really glad if an Indian movie would succeed in the global market without it having to rely on the poverty and dark side of India society but showcase India as an emerging superpower.

Some Things are learnt Better with a Bloody Nose

The last couple of weeks of December was a wonderful vacation back home, so I even took a break from blogging so as to completely stay clear of any sort of mental exertion. I guess considering how 2008 panned out, not many people could say happy new year with any sort of conviction or happiness. It was not just the shadow of the Mumbai Terror attacks but a series of catastrophes plaguing Mother Earth this year. As just a recap how the giants tumbled this year and how the ground shook below our feet.

U.S

The adage if US sneezes the World catches a cold was stretched to the limits, sub prime crisis collapse with Bear Sterns, Freddie Mac and Fannie May meltdown leading the way for more disasters like Lehman Brothers and Merill Lynch collapsing virtually on the same day sent out tremors which will experienced for the great part of the near future. It was ironic, the economy which was earlier this year facing the pressure of high oil prices saw the drip in oil prices from $140 per barrel to fall below $40 per barrel in a matter of six months. I guess now packaged drinking water is much more costly than oil now in the United States now. The host of industries lined up for Federal Aid which including the ailing auto companies which most analysts are convinced are beyond help unless some urgent action is not taken again to reform the operations of the companies. In 2008, US did not any need an external enemy, the self inflicted financial terrorism took its own toll apart from its losses of troops and material in Iraq and Afghanistan.

China

This year, even China has its share of pain, although the impact of global recession on China has not discussed in detail so far, the direct human tragedy which was evident from the earthquakes which took place. Earlier in the year, Tibetan protesters were able to successful in utilizing the Olympics to show case their cause by disturbing the Olympic flame in certain nations and in the riots which took place reflected the underlying unrest in this mighty nation. The iron curtain style of controlling information regarding the milk contamination and the control on the Internet did not exactly cover China in glory this year.

India

India had its share of troubles this year, if the first part of year was marked with the increasing inflation and the serial blasts in several cities across the country was disturbing enough, the stock market crash was a terrible blow. Although Indian economy has strong fundamentals, the impact of global recession has began to show in the companies and in their HR policy. The Mumbai Terror Attacks was like the proverbial last nail in the coffin making this year immensely forgettable.

Well you can imagine how bad this year was, in cricket too, Aussies lost their aura of invincibility in losing first to the Indians and then to South Africa.

Not that it was a bad thing, on this perhaps slightly positive note let us look at the lessons from this year.

• There are events which are beyond our wildest imagination which can go horribly wrong
• No one is invincible and every body needs help
  
• Patience and staying united are key to finding solutions
  
• Goals must be set for the long term and ability to endure pain in the short term
  

Let us hope that 2009 is much better than the last year but if we do not learn from previous year, I am sure 2009 would not be much different as the title of the post goes, some lessons are best learnt with a bloody nose.Anyways the Satyam scandal is not exactly a perfect start to the year. To end on a positive quote, from a great movie, 'The Shawshank Redemption'

Fear can take you prisoner. Hope can set you free...